12 Delayed Movies That Were Doomed to Fail (Or Not)
ENTERTAINMENT
The Tom Cruise–Bryan Singer collaboration Valkyrie has been dumped a second time—from this summer to this fall to the cinematic graveyard of February 2009—placing it among these mistreated movies.
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12. All the King's Men
The journey taken by Sean Penn's adaptation of the 1946 novel—a fictional story based on the life of infamous Louisiana governor Huey Long—was as long and drawn out as the film itself. It was completed in 2005, but took until nearly the end of 2006 to finally start hitting film festivals, and then, finally, your local multiplex.
The Result: A whopping $3.8 million opening weekend and a quick dismissal from the box office.

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11. DOA: Dead or Alive
A crap video game adaptation that, surprisingly, Uwe Boll had nothing to do with. DOA was completed in 2005, and released to foreign markets in 2006. It didn't come to America—normally, the first stop for cinematic bombs—until 2007, despite the presence of stars like Jaime Pressly and…Jaime Pressly.
The Result: By the time people realized it was in theaters, it was on DVD.

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10. Snakes on a Plane
Here's what you get for listening to Internet fan boys. Owing entirely to its ludicrous title, SOAP was a Web phenomenon a full year before hitting theaters. Despite wrapping in 2005, New Line shelved it in order to reshoot scenes, adding violence and nudity (catnip to geeks). It eventually flew into theaters in August of 2006.
The Result: It grossed about half what was expected ($15 million versus a hyped-fueled projection of $30 million), officially making it a "disappointment."

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9. Alpha Dog
Though it was done in time for Sundance 2006, Alpha Dog suffered four release dates in one year due to legal issues. Since the story is a thinly veiled account of an actual crime still being tried, the lawyer for Jesse James Hollywood (real-life counterpart of the film's lead) held up its release. The film finally saw the light of day in January 2007.
The Result: For a small-scale film it did OK. It also garnered critical praise, especially for young stars Emile Hirsch, Ben Foster, and, yes, even Justin Timberlake.

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8. The Brothers Grimm
Terry Gilliam's movies are like the New York Knicks—such complete shambles it's a marvel they exist at all. Grimm wrapped in 2004, but bounced from release date to release date until 2005. Much of the delay involved hiccups in Miramax's merger with Disney, but even Gilliam later admitted that Grimm's script was poop.
The Result: Have you seen it? OK, has anyone you know seen it? Exactly.

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7. The Nanny Diaries
So confident that their lighthearted tale of indentured servitude would win over Oscar voters (who totally relate to nanny abuse), the makers of The Nanny Diaries sat on it for five months. When it came out, it took the world by storm. Which is to say that, like a storm, it passed quickly and annoyed everyone during its brief stay.
The Result: A place on a lot of critics' "Worst Films" lists, and middling box office.



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[12/2/2008]