2007's Dudeliest Dudes of the Year
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STUPID FUN
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Askmen.com thinks David Beckham is this year's alpha male. We disagree.
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The guys at Askmen.com must have been high on hair dye fumes when they
picked Becks as the manliest man of 2007, so we went ahead and made a
list of guys who helped our fine gender progress the most over the last
calendar year.
 5. Bear Grylls
Until
he broke his spine in a parachuting accident, Bear was a member of the
British special forces. Now he makes his money eating grubs and giving
tips on how to survive in the wilderness on Man Vs. Wild.
2007 Highlights
• He
suffered some criticism about the reality of his show, but we think any
guy that will drink the moisture off of elephant poo deserves a night
in a hotel now and then.
• Flew a paraglider over the Himalayan mountains and almost froze to death.
4. Mike Rowe
The host of Discovery's awesomely disgusting show Dirty Jobs gives cubicle jockeys plenty of reasons to appreciate their TPS-report-ravaged lives.
2007 Highlights
• Touched more different kinds of animal puke and crap than anyone else on the planet.
• Put his life on the line for the sake of good TV. That's our kind of guy.
3. Chuck Norris
If Chuck hadn't invented our current system of time measurement, we wouldn't have a 2007 in the first place.
2007 Highlights
• Getting political in '07 by backing presidential candidate Mike Huckabee. He campaigns by breaking the arms of the other candidates.
• Single-handedly made beards cool again.
2. Jimmy Kimmel
Sorry,
Conan, when it comes to talk show hosts, Jimmy is our guy right now.
He's funny, down to earth, and always makes sure his pool house is
stocked with towels for his permanent houseguest, Adam Carolla.
2007 Highlights
• Filled the chairs of wrinkled TV heavyweights Larry King and Regis Philbin.
• Swapped fluids with one of our favorite funny ladies, Sarah Silverman. Nice!
• Unleashed the Internet phenomenon that is "Chocolate Rain" upon the world.
1. Randy Couture
The
UFC's heavyweight champ has been setting the standard for ass-beatings
with his vicious takedowns since many of his competitors were wearing
yellow belts.
2007 Highlights
• TKO'd Gabriel Gonzaga—who is 16 years younger—in three rounds and retained his heavyweight title at UFC 74.
• Left the UFC to pursue his acting career and make some dough without getting his face pounded on six days a week.
• Put out a line of skull-laden clothes through Affliction called Xtreme Couture.
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