Predictions for 2008
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ENTERTAINMENT
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Cram all the misty-eyed looking back, and peer ahead to what we (and your fellow readers) expect from the coming year.
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The writers will still be on strike, and we'll continue not giving a crap.
By July, no one will have any idea what a Soulja Boy is.
Kiefer Sutherland will get busted for DUI while still in jail.
| USER PREDICTION: Jessica Alba, Jessica Simpson, and Jessica Biel will finally do nude scenes (hopefully together). |
Speed Racer will suck.
Will Smith will star in a huge blockbuster that pits him in a me-against-the-world scenario fighting strange creatures that require tons of special effects.
2Pac will release another album of material previously unheard. Even by 2Pac.
| USER PREDICTION: The Dark Knight will be the movie of the summer. |
Lost will make absolutely no sense.
Rob Schneider will win an Oscar…on eBay.
A Grammy will be awarded for "Best Ringtone."
Seth Rogen will officially wear out his welcome.
Basic cable will start showing women's nipples.
| USER PREDICTION: In a last-ditch effort to return to the spotlight, Britney Spears will be willingly featured in a sex tape. |
Apple will make a crappy commercial to promote their new iPod, which won't work with any of your old accessories.
There will still be an inexplicable shortage of Wiis.
| USER PREDICTION: The PS3 will reclaim its position as the top video game console over the Xbox 360. |
Ron Paul won't be elected president, but mentioning him on your Web site will still get you tons of traffic.
| USER PREDICTION: The current time bomb in the Middle East will blow, kicking off World War III. | The Russian Empire will take over the world.
| USER PREDICTION: Matt Damon will support Hillary Clinton, while Ben Affleck shows love for Barack Obama, thus ending their friendship. |
Lance Armstrong will finally admit he lied…about having cancer.
| USER PREDICTION: Thanks to Joe Torre, the Dodgers will win the World Series. | The Miami Dolphins will still be the worst team in the NFL.
In an attempt to go upscale, NASCAR will begin racing limos.
| USER PREDICTION: No PGA golfer will be suspected of steroid use. |
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