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We're literally surrounded by attractive girls here on the beach, and as much as it pains us to interrupt their carefree frolicking, we're going to be grabbing a few aside for some impromptu photo sessions. Our first new friend is Sarah and there are more pictures of her after the break. We recommend putting on some sun tan lotion and rubbing a bunch of sand in your butt crack before looking at them so you get the full beach experience. |
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| The Summer Olympics are coming up, but we're thinking about boycotting the games until bikini contests become an officially sanctioned event. For the unitiated, these contests consist of hot, young ladies taking the stage in their skimpy outfits and busting move after sexy move until only one competitor is left standing. We're not even really sure who won this one or even what the prize is. We are sure that there was a lot of booty shaking involved and that's enough to warrant a post, right? |
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| Not everyone can look good in every picture taken of them, but these unfortunate souls only got one shot and wasted it making some of the most hilarious facial expressions this side of a 2girls1cup reaction video. The link will take you to a few more and we'll keep updating them as long as spring breakers keep making silly faces. |
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The need to check out beautiful girls is hard wired directly into most guys' DNA, but there's a certain amount of discretion that should be used when doing so, even at the tan skin showroom that is spring break. Our boy in the picture above is doing everything you should definitely not do if you don't want to look like a total creep. Below are a few tips on how to get in your glances without looking like a chump.
Be quick about it: The best way to get caught gawking is to linger longer than you have to. Take a peek and move on. Anything more is dirty old man or too-friendly gym teacher status. Don't look with your whole body: Your eyes are on your head, so just turn that if possible. If you have to turn your whole body to see what's up, it's probably not worth it. That's the move that gets you beat up by her Lacrosse playing boyfriend.Make sure there are no cameras around: A picture with a hot girl and a wide-eyed douche is worth forwarding to your buddies. Don't be that douche.Keep it to yourself: You're at spring break so there's a good chance there are plenty of other hot girls to look ati. Elbowing your buddy and saying, "Bro, check her out, bro," is a good way to get you both busted. |
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While the rest of us were here, shaking our collective fists at the government for stealing an hour of sleep from us with their crazy daylight savings time, a few lucky Maxim.com staffers headed out to Panama City Beach for spring break. They're going to be out there documenting all the crazy and ridiculous stuff that's happening and putting it here to make us happy and parents angry. The party last night was at Club La Vela, which roughly translates to "Club Wasted Tuition." Take the link to another picture of our girl in the pink fishnets and keep checking back for more crazy crap as we get it.
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