There are six millions ways to die, and game makers are working gradually to develop a sound sequence for every one of them. Here are our favorites, ranked according the way in which we'd most like to go out. (Feel free to add yours in the comments.)


12. Mike Tyson's Punch Out (1987, NES)


Death Sounds Like: "Wow wow wee waa!"
Why It's Here: Punctuating the pummeling you receive is the death knell we all dreaded, a loud whirr of terror issued by your limp body as it hits the floor for a third and final time. Adding insult to injury, your opponent, in teabag formation, squats and laughs in your face like he just took your prison cherry.


11. The Legend of Zelda (1987, NES)


Sounds Like: Pixies getting pushed down a flight of stairs
Why It's Here: This is where many of us first learned what happens when you die: the world around you turns red, you spin around exactly four times, turn to stone, and then disappear in an elf fart.

10. Mario 64 (1996, Nintendo 64)

Sounds Like: 45 years spent smoking
Why It's Here: Courtesy of the game's awkward camera angles, your 7,983 accidental freefalls from a dozen stories up mean King Koopa's pixelated pussface makes another unscheduled appearance each and every time, making his evil laugh as ubiquitous as a Don Imus minority joke.

9. Donkey Kong (1986, NES)

Sounds Like: Mario's 8-bit tears falling
Why It's Here:  Two decades ago, developers only had four months to get a game out the door before the repo man would come and take away their motherboards. So it's no wonder each step you take in the game sounds like you're stomping on baby seal heads.

8. Gears of War (2006, Xbox 360)

Sounds Like: Running over your neighbor with a lawnmower
Why It's Here: The person being chainsawed continues to scream long after his torso is separated from the rest of his body.

7. Tomb Raider (1997, PlayStation)

Sounds Like: The Sex and the City premiere. In a fireplace
Why It's Here: You get three Lara Croft yelps for the price of one suicide. Topping it all off is the combustion and subsequent flotation of her body upon hitting lava in what appears to be my grandmother's living room.

6. Mortal Kombat II (1994, Super Nintendo, Sega Genesis)

Sounds Like: An old guy stating the obvious
Why It's Here: This represented a quantum leap in the evolution of game death audio, paving a blood-and-bone-strewn blueprint for future video game developers and NFL Hall-of-Famers to follow.

5. Sonic the Hedgehog (1991, Sega Genesis)

Sounds Like: Nothingness
Why It's Here: You'd think the game's Jaws-like run-up to the moment of death would culminate in some kind of climax, but all you get is deadening silence and Sonic falling toward the Panaphonic logo on our television. Where do all game characters go when they fall off-screen anyway?

4. Metal Gear Solid 4 (2008, PlayStation 3)

Sounds Like: The "Can you hear me now?" guy on his worst day 
Why It's Here: Otacon can see firsthand every one of your moves because he gave you a camouflage Mk. II scout metal gear equipped with a camera. Yet, he still has the nerve to ask you what's wrong after 75 gunshots to your throat. What do you think happened, jackass?

3. Super Mario Bros. (1985, NES)

Sounds Like: Getting caught masturbating
Why It's Here: ...Which is a fitting accompaniment to the emotional blue balls of being repeatedly told, "Thanks, but our Princess is in another castle!" This game made us even for Hiroshima.

2. Pac Man (1980, Arcade)
 
Sounds Like: Losing on The Price Is Right
Why It's Here: I wasn't even alive when this game came out, but here it is, beep-booping almost 30 years later. Back then, things like scores actually meant something, so getting caught by the bad guys got you one step further from getting "FUK" onto the High Scores list.

1. Sega Rally 2 (1998, Arcade)

Sounds Like: That annoying guy who's always in a good mood
Why It's Here: You just trashed your rally car and didn't make time, fine. But Sega rubs it in your face with a Game Over screen straight out of the Kool-Aid Man's playbook. Game Over YEAAAH?! No, no, no—Game Over NO. I'm pressing the start button and putting the cheat codes in.


Honorable Mentions:
Kid Icarus (1987, NES)

Guitar Hero series (2005–2008, PS2/Xbox 360/PS3)