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The Four Best Vacation Spots For Super Villains

Because evil maniacs need time off, too.




We know, your back hurts and it feels like you are carrying the weight of the world. Or maybe you actually did invent some sort of ray gun that can literally carry the weight of the world. Either way, it’s time to get out of that lair and stretch your legs a little bit. But where to? Sure, you could book a trip to Sandals Jamaica, but you’ll only end up terrorizing the guy who runs the poolside limbo competition.

Villains are a special breed, and therefore deserve a special vacation; here are the top four spots to hang your helmet (you know, the one with the horns on it).

Destination: Mainland China
Whose Apartment You Can Rent: The Mandarin
Why People Like It: Ancient capitals and centuries-old art will convert even the most skeptical traveler.
Why You’ll Like It: Piles of geo-political tension make operating on the evil side of the law that much easier. If you get tired of the dumpling houses and Chinese opera, feel free to leverage the country’s conflict for your own rise to wealth and power. Also, don’t miss the Great Wall!

Destination: Corleone, Sicily, Italy
Whose Apartment You Can Rent: Silvermane
Why People Like It: Set in a beautiful mountainous region, the town boasts historic churches dating as far back as the 14th century.
Why You’ll Like It: It’s a headquarters for all flavors of Mafia, including the Maggia (Marvel comics’ international crime syndicate), and the Corleone family of The Godfather fame. It’s also just a hop and a skip down the road from Castello Soprano, the namesake of Tony and Carmela’s crew. Relax in a villa, and just be sure to pay your respects to the Don, or you could be doing your sleeping with the fishes, capiche?

Destination: New York City
Whose Apartment You Can Rent: Kingpin
Why People Like It: Packed with history, culture, and some of the best cuisine on the planet, the streets are never devoid of tourists.
Why You’ll Like It: For the romantic villain, there is no better place to wreak havoc than New York City. Whether it’s Ozymandias dropping a fake alien on the island or Shriek and Carnage going on a killing spree across it, you can’t set foot anywhere in NYC without some true super villain history. Of course, you will have to deal with other annoying residents of the metropolis, like Spider-Man, Iron Man, Daredevil, and the shitty guy in the glass box in the subway station.

Destination: Latveria
Whose Apartment You Can Rent: Doctor Doom
Why People Like It: Surrounded by beautiful mountain ranges, Latveria is home to wonderful Doom’s Day celebrations (at the whim of Doctor Doom, of course).
Why You’ll Like It: The country is ruled by Doctor Doom, and its cities include Doomstadt, Doomsdale, and Doomton (real subtle, Doc). You’d have to imagine they are pretty lenient on Super Villains seeking amnesty or just a weekend away from the kids. However, the Doctor is not around for much of the time due to villain-y activities such as trying to kill the Fantastic Four, trying to kill Spider-Man, trying to kill the Avengers, and bird-watching. This means you won’t be hassled with all the hubbub that goes with meeting the Doctor, bowing before him, and swapping recipes, or whatever.

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