Dumbest Dumb-Asses in Sports: Lavar Arrington

We honor the truly “special” athletes, commentators, and owners who make us say, “Huh?”
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We honor the truly “special” athletes, commentators, and owners who make us say, “Huh?”
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You may find this hard to believe, especially if you watch an interview with a hockey player, but the world of sports has gotten much smarter in the 21st century. We have better stat metrics to measure player value, and we can now watch nationally televised baseball without fear of Joe Morgan analyzing a game. That is some amazing progress.

But these are still sports we’re talking about, and we can never excise stupidity altogether. On a certain level, sports are a celebration of idiocy, a time when we cast aside boring things such as logic and reason in favor of good old-fashioned hittin’ and runnin’ to settle matters. You can still get away with that sort of thing in sports. Consequently, there will always be dumb athletes, there will always be dumb coaches, and there will always be dumb analysts.

So let us take a moment to tip our caps to those regressionists: 10 brave souls willing to resist the growing sophistication of sports by remaining hardheaded, mouth-breathing imbeciles. Look well upon this group, for the likes of them may not be around much longer. Probably because they’ll end up accidentally eating toilet cleaner.



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RADIO REFUDIATOR

LaVar Arrington


Do you miss Emmitt Smith raping the Queen’s English by unwittingly inventing new and dangerous words on television? Well, fear not, for there are still broadcasters out there willing to debacle the language.

Take former NFL linebacker LaVar Arrington, who now hosts his own radio program in

the D.C. metro area. If you like hearing the phrase “at the same token” used without correction, Arrington’s show is the place for you! You’ll get plenty of pertinary football analysis, and the out-of-the-blocks opinions you can’t find anywhere else.