Reality TV Girls

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You’ve seen ’em at their worst—crying, fighting, covered in bull feces—and they were still hotter than looted Iraqi artifacts. Now check ’em out all dolled up and stripped down.

Paris Hilton & Nicole Richie

Where you’ve seen them:
Nicole is the daughter of Lionel “Say You, Say Me” Richie and Paris’ family owns the $3.8 billion-a-year Hilton hotel empire.

Where to see more:
They are the first guinea pigs on Fox’s new reality show, The Simple Life, in which two superhot, filthy-rich big-city debutantes are sent to live with an Arkansas farming family, totally cut off from everything (money, cell phones, butlers, their self-respect) and are forced to interact with—gasp!—common folk and mangy farm animals.

Recipe for disaster:
“I’m really bad sometimes. I’m impulsive and always tempted to do things I’m not supposed to do. So I can totally see myself getting into trouble on the show.”—Nicole

Coming clean:
“I love animals, I hate dead things, and I won’t play with poop.”—Paris

Click here to see more of Paris

Kim Caldwell

Where you’ve seen her:
Kimberly was one of 12 finalists on American Idol: Season 2 before every fat and ugly girl with a telephone voted her off.

Where to see more:
Fox Sports Net’s new extreme sports show, 54321. “I don’t actually play any extreme sports, but I love ’em. I’ve never been a typical girl. I got challenged all the time when I was younger,” she says, referring to jealous girls and controlling men. “But as a Texas girl, I promise you: Don’t mess with me. Because I will throw down. And I will win.” Mee-ow!

Young ’n’ restless:
Kim’s mother started taking her to beauty pageants at age five. “I remember saying, ‘Mom, I want to be in the talent category.’ But she was like, ‘Huh, babe? You don’t have a talent.’ So I learned a song, and the next week I won first place!“

Secret wish:
“If I could change anything about myself, I’d have bigger boobs. But if I did get a boob job, I’d be like, ‘Check ’em out! Aren’t they great?’ I wouldn’t be one of those girls who try to pretend nothing happened.“

Chantille Boudousque

Where you’ve seen her:
On the victory stand of ABC’s Are You Hot?

Where to see more:
Last month the New Orleans native was serving drinks and making the world hotter than a rectal thermometer in South Beach. “I also worked the door at Crobar, Miami’s most exclusive nightclub. Now I’m moving to L.A.”

On Lorenzo Lamas:
“He was the worst judge…ripping everyone. Where does he get off? He hasn’t had a career in 10 years. He did point the laser at me once, because I wore a bikini with cowboy boots. I think he was upset I wasn’t wearing big stripper shoes.”

Family matters:
“My dad’s a conservative lawyer, so I didn’t even tell him I was on the show.”

Melissa Howard

Where you’ve seen her:
Remember the wild chick on Real World: New Orleans who jumped on stage at a strip joint? Yeah? Then you’re probably the only guy who watches that show, Mary.

Where to see more:
Girls Behaving Badly, the surprisingly funny all-women practical joke reality show, back for its second season on the Oxygen network. C’mon, now you’re going to pretend you don’t watch Oxygen?

Stage fright:
On trying her hand at stand-up comedy in L.A.: “Getting up onstage and making jokes is the scariest thing in the world…I love it.”

Suddenly single:
“I was always that long-term-relationship girl. Now I’m single and kinda socially inept. The only guys I meet are either wearing house-arrest anklets or picking up trash on the side of the highway. But I ain’t picky.”