Mad Men Season Premiere Recap

Telling you what happened on this Sunday’s season premiere…from the future!

Telling you what happened on this Sunday’s season premiere…from the future!

This Sunday, Mad Men returns for its sixth season. We haven’t seen it yet, because we lack time traveling technology, but we have seen a lot of television (like, seriously enough TV to cause eye cancer or at least some serious skin lesions). So here’s a recap of what we think is going to happen!

– Don Draper has sex with some women that aren’t his wife.

– Roger Sterling drinks a lot.

– Pete Campbell is smarmy and also losing his hair.

– Trudy Campbell isn’t in this episode and probably won’t be in many episodes because Alison Brie is getting really famous and she’s like, “C’mon guys, I can’t be a tertiary character on a TV show, even if it’s a really quality TV show like Mad Men, unless you’re going to pay me some serious scrilla.”

– AMC does not have a lot of scrilla.

– Clients come to the office and are like, “Wow, Joan has large breasts.”

– Peggy works for a long time in the office, probably at night.

– Cooper is dead by now maybe? Or he’s in the episode for like 30 seconds.

– Don says some really deep shit about a deodorant spray (but it’s really a metaphor for Don’s confusion about his own identity).

– Roger Sterling drinks a lot.

– Megan says something in French.

– Roger Sterling and Don Draper drink a lot.

And that’s what’s going to happen on the premiere of the sixth season of Mad Men! If we’re wrong, feel free to tell us in the comments. If we’re right, feel free to tell us in the comments. If you like eating fried butter, feel free to tell us in the comments!

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