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15 Things Never to Say to a Stripper

Honestly – other than “Thank you”, it’s best to just keep your mouth shut


“Which do you think is more noticeable when you’re naked, your appendix scar, or your Caesarian scar?”

“I only have $1.59 in change, can I still put it in your panties?”

“You look just like my sister.”

“If I give you fifty bucks, can we just have a bit of a cuddle?”

“I bought a pack of dances on Groupon.”

Chris Rock was lying, right?”

“It must be so nice to have a job you really love.”

“Did you get that tattoo for artistic reasons, or just to cover your track marks?”

“No, it’s ok, I like it when you’re lactating.”

“What does Bret Michaels’ cock taste like? Is it yeast extract? It’s yeast extract, right?”

“Do you take Transit Check?”

“So – are you sick of Charlie Sheen jokes yet?”

“The larger of your boobs keeps hitting me in the eye.”

“Is that the exit wound?”

“Don’t worry, that’s not pee.”

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