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4 Major Feats That Took Less Time Than The Government Shutdown

Like, say, the creation of the world according to The Bible.

Photo: Getty Images | Licensed to Alpha Media Group 2013

The Creation of the World (According to The Bible):
Hey, we're not really huge readers of the Book of Genesis, but word on the street is that God created the world in six days. And on the seventh, He rested, yo. In the time it took for these clowns on Capitol Hill to get their shit together, two worlds could have been created, and we'd already be on World 3.

Ending the Cuban Missile Crisis
Beginning during this very same week back in 1962, it only took 13 days for the threat of all-out nuclear war between the U.S. and its communist enemies (Russia and Cuba) to subside without any violence. In contrast, in the 16 days that these numb nuts held the country hostage, absolutely nothing was accomplished. (Unless you count a dramatic shift in the public's trust in its elected leaders. Because in that sense, it's been a super productive few weeks!)

Beating Grand Theft Auto V
BuzzFeed's Joseph Bernstein played the whole game, from beginning to end, in one 38-hour sitting. But you don't have to be nearly as ambitious as him to make the Federal Government look lazy by comparison. So, just to clarify, you could sit on your ass playing video games for two weeks straight, and you'll still be way more productive than the United States government.

Losing a Guy in 10 Days
Poor Kate Hudson started off trying to lose a guy, but then she fell for him, but then she found out she hated him, only to discover 10 days later that she really loves him. And all while she was married to one of the Black Crowes.


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