Something smells like receding hairline.
(Photo: China Stringer Network /Landov | Licensed to Alpha Media Group 2013)
When we think of Chinese medicine, we usually think of healing herbs, acupuncture, and, well, dong tea. Growing a schnoz on a dude’s forehead to eventually transplant it between his eyes is more something we’d attribute to Star Trek, or that really weird pay-per-view movie that was on our hotel TV in Bulgaria. But sometimes truth is stranger than fiction (even fiction created for the darkest corners of Eastern European pornography), and such is the case of “Xiaolian,” a car accident victim whose sniffer was severely damaged by infection. Doctors were not able to repair it, so they decided that they’d just Frankenstein his face back together.
The nose was built with cartilage from Xiaolian’s ribs after a “skin expander” (which, coincidentally, was also the name of the Bulgarian movie) was applied to his forehead. Once the nose finishes growing – a process that we assume consists of it taking some time off from college to backpack around Europe and find itself – the nose will be chopped off and dropped in the right spot. When asked whether this will end up leaving a horrific scar on Xiaolian’s forehead, the doctors were quoted as saying “Oh. Shit."
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