These senior citizens have given us many years of entertainment, societal contributions, and the heebie-jeebies.

Joel Godard- The Late Night With Conan O'Brien announcer's trademark big openmouthed smile has the power to either brighten someone's day, or inflict the fear that he's about to swallow someone's fetus. Either or.

Rip Taylor- Take Rue McClanahan's hair, Carrot Top's comic stylings, Liberace's wardrobe, and then sprinkle generously with bat shit craziness, and you've got Rip Taylor, the "king of confetti," who is also king of our nightmares. The only difference with Nightmare Rip is that when we wake up, he goes away.

Mr. Six- How do you lure more kids to Six Flags theme parks? Get a wrinkly bald geezer who drives a molestation bus and dances maniacally to the song "We Like to Party" as your mascot. Oh, wait…that's how you scare the living bejesus out of them! To entice them, they could always—oh, we don't know—get rides?

Gary Glitter- The glam rocker's 1973 hit "I'm the Leader of the Gang (I Am)" was slightly overshadowed by his later release "I'm the Owner of Pornography of Underage Girls (I Am)."

Larry King- This CNN curmudgeon and rumored chronic gas-passer has managed to get married seven times. To women! What's his secret? The man never dies!

Bea Arthur- What looks like a dude, sounds like a dude, and menstruates as often as dudes do? This dude!

Bruce Vilanch- As a joke writer and 300-pound mass of blubber and hair, Bruce should be behind the camera, yet somehow, he's waddled in front of it for shows like Hollywood Squares and Celebrity Fit Club. We'll take the center square to block…out the image of Bruce Vilanch doing shirtless squats.

Andy Rooney- Andy is like the crotchety grandpa who insists on calling black people "Negroes" and his eyebrows "bangs." Seriously, Rooney, there's a grooming tool called "tweezers." Look into it.

Wilford Brimley- The only thing grosser than an old person is a diseased old person. So every time we hear the grandpa of Our House talk about his "diabeetis" during commercial breaks, we put down our Little Debbie Snack Cake and pick up a barf bucket. Couldn't you have kept shilling for Quaker Oats, Wilf?

Larry Craig- It's not the fact that he's a married Republican senator who was caught cruising for dudes in an airport bathroom that we find creepy. It's his response: "I don't go around anywhere hitting on men. And by God, if I did, I wouldn't do it in Boise, Idaho! Jiminy!" Exclamations from the early 19th century? How freaking old is this 'mo?! Jiminy indeed.

Ed McMahon- If Ed McMahon showed up on our doorstep holding balloons and a giant check made out for a gazillion dollars, we'd run the other way screaming, "Heeeeeeeeeere's that nutcase sidekick with the scary laugh!"

Eddie Van Halen- We have to give Eddie Van Halen some credit. After being treated for mouth cancer twice and losing one-third of his tongue, the man still smokes! He's no quitter, and he's got the hobbit-witch-hybrid-corpse look to prove it.