You'll never be able to un-see this.
It might feel like summer is never coming, but let us assure you that, eventually, it will, and at some point you'll have no choice but to take your shirt off. Luckily, the forthcoming issue of MAD Magazine contains this handy guide to differentiating between the assorted types of man boobs, and they've given us an exclusive preview of the graphic:
Illustrated by Drew Friedman and written by Ryan Pagelow, the parody contains a variety of colorful descriptive terms for every unfortunate man-boob scenario - from "Gorillas in the Mist" (which bear a striking resemblance to Homer Simpson's face) to "Deflated Balloons."
Much like our own man-boobs, this is both hilarious and disgusting. But on the other hand, thanks to MAD, when we are forced to remove our shirts, causing people nearby to immediately gasp in horror and ask, "What the FUCK are THOSE?", at least now we'll have an answer.
The issue hits stores on April 30th. Until then, check out the new cover below.
Also on Maxim.com: