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Hooray For Flag Day!

Our fashion-forward panel celebrates Old Glory’s annual exultation (June 14, Save-The-Daters!) by deconstructing other countries’ icky emblems.

1. SAUDI ARABIA

Andrew: The sword is quiet but pointed, and I can only imagine what the text says. Hopefully it explains how this flag is completely badass.
Ann C.: I like the pretty sword. It says “religion of peace” to me.
Jim: Normally, to see this shade of green, you’d have to drop enough acid to para­lyze a medium-size rhinoceros.
Anne S.: Makes me feel like my mother is yelling at me so loudly that I can’t understand a word she’s saying. But it doesn’t matter because she is about to lop my head off with that sword.

2. ARGENTINA

Andrew: The sky blue sets up the sun nicely—and what a sun it is! This flag rules. Deal with it.
Jim: This looks like the Pan Am logo. The pained expression on the sun’s face reminds me of a 10-year-old playing a sunflower in the school play.
Anne S.: This has a certain sexy arrogance that I find appealing.
Nolé: That light blue’s so fresh, so spring. Paired with the white and yellow of the summer sun? Girl! Argentina’s flag better work!

3. BERMUDA

Andrew: The ship on the shield doesn’t appear to have any sails, which would explain why it’s crashing into the rocks.
Jim: Nothing I love more than a flag that can’t make up its mind. It’s almost as if half the country wanted to be British and the other half wanted to live on Fraggle Rock.
Anne S.: What a mess, but it looks like a good time.

4. IRAN

Andrew: One of the all-time great flags (and I’m not just saying that because my wife is Persian). I like how they’re tipping their hat to Italy. The best Italian food is in northern Iran. I’m going to get some Iranian penne alla vodka and party hard!
Jim: Reminds me of Italy, if Italy were run by a sociopath in a Members Only jacket.
Nolé: Looks like Italy’s flag: the red sole of a Louboutin stiletto, the white of an Armani spring suit, and the green of a Fendi purse, all with a Middle Eastern twist. Fierce!
Ann C.: Where have I seen this flag before? Oh, yeah, I remember: flying at Sean Penn’s house.