User menu

Main menu


It’s Official: There Are Unicorns in North Korea!

Or at least there were!

North Korea, the greatest place on Earth, recently reconfirmed the existence of the unicorn lair once inhabited by the steed of King Tongmyong, founder of the Koguryo Kingdom (one of the three ancient Korean empires). Let’s repeat that: North Korean science farmers reconfirmed the existence of a unicorn lair. They already knew about the unicorn lair, they just wanted to make sure it was still there, being a unicorn lair. Here’s how that probably played out:

North Korean science doctor 1: “Hey, haven’t checked on that unicorn lair in a bit. Fancy a stroll, compadre?”

North Korean rocket professor 2: “Sounds great. Let me finish up curing AIDs and cancer using only medieval farming equipment…okay done.”

North Korean science doctor 1: Laughs

North Korean rocket professor 2: Laughs

Both are shot

So how were they totally positive it was a unicorn lair and not, say, a manticore or the more common centaur layer? A “rectangular rock” outside the cave is carved with the words “unicorn lair.” Game, set, match America.

The Top 5 Celebrity Brawls
Child Stars All Grown-Up