Q: Why did Helen Keller masturbate with one hand?
A: So she could moan with the other.
He’s close to death but far from decency.
A brunette, a redhead, and a blonde are sitting around talking about their kids. The brunette says, “I found cigarettes in my daughter’s room, and I didn’t know she smoked.” The redhead replies, “I...
A couple is shopping in the mall for hours. The wife turns to talk to her husband and realizes he’s nowhere in sight. Angry, she calls his cell phone and asks where he disappeared to. “Honey,” he...
Q: What's the difference between jam and jelly?
A: I can't jelly my dick up your ass.
--James Riel, Boston, MA
A girl from Texas and a girl from New York were seated side by side on an airplane. The girl from Texas, being friendly and all, said: "So, where y'all from?" The New York girl said, "From a place...
He's close to death but far from decency.
A male patient is lying in bed in the hospital, wearing an oxygen mask over his mouth and nose. A young, student nurse appears to give him a partial sponge bath. “Nurse", he mumbled from behind the...
Q: How did the hillbilly find his sister in the woods?
A: Pretty hot
“Have you ever smelled mothballs?” a little kid asks his dad.
“Of course,” replies the dad.
The kid thinks about this for a moment and asks, “Well, how did you get their little legs apart?”