An Old Fart Goes to Confession and says, “Father, I’m 82, and I just slept with two women.”
The priest says,” Say three Hail Marys and all will be forgiven.”
“I don’t know the Hail Mary,” the old...
A Guy Walks Into a Hillbilly Bar and orders a white wine.
The bartender says, “You ain’t from around here, are ya?”
The guy says, “No, I’m from Canada. I’m a taxidermist.”
The barkeep asks, “what...
A Man Pulls Into a Gas Station in his Porsche, and a kid on a tricycle starts riding around him.
“Wanna race?” asks the kid.
“No thanks,” laughs the guy and drives off.
When he gets on the highway...
Q: What’s the difference between and oral and a rectal thermometer? A: he taste.
Q: What do you call a dog with three legs and steel balls? A: Sparky
Q: What do you do if you want your girlfriend...
A vampire bat covered in blood returns to a cave. The other bats hound him until he agrees to show them where he got it.
After leading the pack for over a mile, the first bat suddenly slows lead one...
The Smith family is driving behind a trash truck when a large dildo flies out and hits their windshield. To hide her embarrassment, the mother turns and says to her young kids, "My, what a big insect...
A wife comes home from a business trip to Las Vegas and tells her husband she’s moving there immediately.
When the distraught husband asks why, she says, "Because I can make $300 a day there doing...
Q: What has two legs and bleeds? A: Half a dog.
Q: What’s gray and comes in pints? A: An elephant.
Q: What do you call two skunks doing a 69? A: Odor eaters.
Cletus and Jeb are sitting on...
“When I have a sore throat, I always give my husband a blow job.” Sue tells her friend Carol. “The day after, it’s all better. You should try it.”
A day later Sue asked Carol is she followed her...
Q: What’s the difference between and dog and a fox?
A: Four beers.
LARRY L.
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