If the world ends today, you're going to want to have some lines ready for when it's time to "repopulate the Earth."
Photo: Peter Zelei / Getty Images | Licensed to Alpha Media Group 2012
1. "How about you and me get off this rapidly dissolving ice floe and go for a drink of delicious salt water?"
2. "You have a beautiful eye."
3. "Hi, I noticed you were busy digging a mass grave for the remains of your family. You're gonna laugh, but, I literally just finished doing that myself."
4. "Girl, are those chemical burns, or did you get them when you fell from heaven?"
5. "Is this a giant, radioactive tumor in my pocket, or am I just glad to see you?"
6. "Who's wearing green and has tickets for the last moon colony shuttle before the Earth implodes? This guy."
7. "Hey, are you bi? Cause you're the only biped I see! Seriously, though, there are no other humans here."
8. "I couldn't help but notice you still have most of your skin. Guys must come up to you all the time."
9. "How about it – you, me, a bottle of cyanide?"
10. "I can tie a cherry stem with my tongue. Actually, I do most things with my tongue - I lost both my arms in the first wave of the atomic dinosaur firestorm."
Prepping for the Apocalypse Like a Lunatic
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