User menu

Main menu

Funny

The World Is Ending!

Or Martians are invading. Or there’s just a meteor shower. Or something.

Today, a 160-meter asteroid is due to pass 17,000 miles from Earth. Does that sound really far away? Well, it shouldn’t, because the GPS satellites you use to navigate your way to Wendy’s aren’t that close. Earlier this morning, a series of meteors (smaller hunks of rock) appear to have streaked over and into Russia. Here are a few videos, most including a truly pants-shitting boom:









And here’s what someone is reporting on twitter as explosive damage from an impact. So here are your three scenarios:

War of the Worlds
These meteors contain the tripod army of a Martian invasion, in which case, find your nearest Tom Cruise and hunker down.

Deep Impact
African-American president? Check. Giant asteroid heading towards Earth? Check. So find your nearest Robert Duvall and hunker down.

Star Man
The Russians have accidently shot down a friendly envoy from an alien civilization -- time to find your nearest Jeff Bridges and hunker down.

Whatever you decide to do in the face of these apocalyptic scenarios, we strongly urge you to commence hunkering immediately.

Pick-Up Lines For The Apocalypse
Varsity Girls