Consider this a pubic service announcement.
Injuries caused by overzealous vaginal grooming are on the rise, according to a new study published in the journal, Who Cares About Cancer When We Could Research Ladies' Pubes? Scientists revealed that between 2002 and 2010, cuts and infections related to waxing, shaving, and vajazzling have increased five-fold. That's a whole lot of diseased FUPAs. And just so you know, gals, gluing sparkly precious gems to your hoo-ha isn't going to distract anyone from the festering sores. The more you know!
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Show me some ladies without sores.