These cell stars can run apps for killing time or planning a killer time. They make calls, too. Which one belongs in your pocket?
THE SEXY FLEXY
Motorola Backflip: $199 with two-year AT&T contract
THE LOWDOWN
AT&T’s first Android cell rocks a reverse-clamshell design that has it flipping more ways than a Denny’s line cook. While you bang out beautiful sentences on the QWERTY keyboard, you can use the tiny touch panel hidden underneath to navigate the 3.1-inch screen without grubbing it up with your nasty-ass paws. At night you can flip it into tabletop mode and use it as an alarm clock.
BUY IT IF...
You’re big on design and even bigger on networking: The unit’s Motoblur home screen uses your pals’ updates and photos as moving wallpaper and allows you to simultaneously update your Facebook and Twitter accounts.
DON ’T BUY IT IF...
You want a lightning-quick Android phone to run an ass ton of apps—get the Droid, since it has a faster processor.
att.com/backflip
SCREEN SAVIOR
HTC HD2: $200 with two-year T-Mobile contract
THE LOWDOWN
This phone’s stunning 4.3-inch OLED touchscreen (biggest on the market) and speedy 1 GHz Snapdragon processor make it so pretty and versatile that you may find it trying to steal job duties from your Kindle, plasma TV, and laptop. And at just .43 inches thin with a 5 mp LED-flash still and video camera, this is the sexiest bit of cell phone circuitry out right now; unfortunately, it’s saddled with a headache-inducing version of the Windows Mobile 6.5 OS.
BUY IT IF...
You want your stunning showpiece of a phone to start conversations when you set it on the dinner table (hey, it’s better than talking about your receding hairline).
DON ’T BUY IT IF...
You can wait a few months for HTC to debut the similarly sexy cell phone running the more capable—and more app-friendly—Android OS.
htc.com
ESSENTIAL APPS: Windows phone
1/ JACK THE RIPPER
Whoopee cushion technology for the 21st century has arrived. This app puts more than 40 fart sounds at your fingertips and includes flatulent features such as the Fart-A-Piano, the Simon
Says clone Fartman Says, and a motion detector that will rip one at the first sign of movement. $1
2/ G-ALARM
Tired of sleeping through your wimpy cell phone alarm? G-Alarm will put an end to that immediately. Our favorite feature is its “quiz” mode, which forces deep sleepers to solve puzzles in order to turn the damn thing off. You’ll never miss an episode of Live! With Regis and Kelly again. $7
3/ SPINBALLS
Spinballs is an addictive app that channels classic games such as Tetris and Rubik’s Cube. Sharp hand-eye coordination is a must as you connect like-colored balls through a series of rotating disks. The only puzzle left? Figuring out why you still live with your parents. $3
SILVER APPLE
iPhone 3GS: From $199 with two-year AT&T contract
THE LOWDOWN
Naysayers and tech-heads give the Jesus phone a demerit for its inability to fully multitask or run
Flash, but more than 40 million of these gadgets have sold for a reason: No other handset makes it simpler to create, spread, and consume the digital stuff that makes up our mobile lives. The recent processor, camera, and video upgrades are pretty sweet, but we’re really stoked about a rumored fourth-generation iPhone this summer that could add a front-facing cam, a higher-res OLED screen, and the ability to turn water into a pinot noir via Bluetooth.
BUY IT IF...
Apps are your thing. The iTunes store’s crazyhuge selection of time wasters (150,000 and counting) simply dwarfs the number of programs in the Android Market (20,000+) and the WebOS Marketplace (1,000).
DON ’T BUY IT IF…
You’re allergic to iTunes. apple.com
ESSENTIAL APPS: iPhone
1/ I AM T-PAIN
Want to sound like the hook master himself? Run I Am T-Pain, hold the phone up to your hopefully diamond-encrusted grill, and sing away. This is real Antares Auto-Tune tech. The very gear T-Pain uses on his tracks. Some would say he’s stupid to give his secrets away. We say he’s stupid like a fox. $10
2/ FAN FINDER
You are the loneliest person on Earth. You’re a Mets fan in Philadelphia (or a Mets fan anywhere, really). Well, download FanFinder and discover every sports bar in your area and its team affiliation in seconds. This handy tool covers all major sports, and the WNBA…just kidding! Girls can’t play basketball. FREE
3/ MAXIM
This is just self-explanatory. Get every great article in this very mag in phone form. Girls, cars, games, jokes, and all the amazing life-altering stories published each month are just a download away. Now we fit right in your front pocket! OK, get your hand out of there—you’re having way too much fun. $3
4/ KLUCKR
The location finder for the wing expert is now on the iPhone. The app for all those interested in the world of wings, and it's mobile! With over 20,000 locations on the map to go get wings in order to enjoy the hottest, tastiest wings anywhere, you'd really have to be a chicken not to have this on your phone. (Sorry, we couldn't help ourselves!)
THE TASK MASTER
Palm Pre Plus: $150 with two-year Verizon contract
THE LOWDOWN
Palm’s touchscreen/QWERTY hybrid slider smartphone has a stonelike, zen synergy feel in the pocket but multitasks like a Mensa member on meth—it can run an insane-a-tang 50 apps at once. But the phone’s real genius is an OS that makes switching between all the apps as simple as the swipe of a finger. It’s the most intuitive phone interface on the planet. Plus it’s got a 3-mp LED flash cam that now records surprisingly clear video.
BUY IT IF…
You see yourself streaming Slipknot on Pandora as you Facebook, surf the Net, and send e-mail while shaving your pubes and driving.
DON ’T BUY IT IF…
You’re frequently off the grid. We found killing the battery in less than 24 hours easy to do, even
when just using it moderately.
ESSENTIAL APPS: Webos
1/ GLAD THAT’S NOT ME
Feeling down? Well, at least you’re not these poor fellows. GTNM aggregates submissions from fmylife.com, textsfromlastnight.com, and others onto one screen because all instances of hilarious drunk-texting gone awry should be indexed and published for everyone else’s amusement. $1
2/ ARE YOU WATCHING THIS?!
What’s more annoying than Office Watercooler Guy explaining how awesome last night’s hoops game was? The fact that you missed that game. RUWT? alerts you in real time if there’s a sporting event currently on TV it’s worth selling your soul for a ride to the sports bar. $1
3/ NEED FOR SPEED UNDERCOVER
It’s not every day you get to battle cop cars and helicopters, but we recommend you do it in this gnarly game (rendered in 3-D on the Pre). Choose from 20 slick-wheeling rides and make a name for yourself on the mean streets of…suburban Florida? $10
G THING
Google Nexus One: $179 with two-year T-Mobile contract, or $529 without
THE LOWDOWN
Google’s first handset (made by HTC) lands some Android love on a sexy bod very similar to the
iPhone’s. Almost like a twin. At first glance this one looks even hotter, since the 3.7-inch AMOLED screen shows tack-sharp images and pure blacks. Unfortunately, the touchscreen navigator isn’t as smooth as the iPhone’s (or the Pre Plus’). But it beats the iPhone in camera specs, and this one has an LED flash, so your snaps at last call should come out sharper than you remembered.
BUY IT IF...
Your digital life takes place on Google (Gmail, Gchat, et al.) and you want a stylish Android phone.
DON ’T BUY IT IF...
You’re fat-fingered. Get the Droid (it’s got a keyboard).
ESSENTIAL APPS: Android
1/ NBA GAME TIME
Love the NBA but can’t afford cable TV? NBA Game Time is perfect for the penny-pinching superfan on the go. Highlights include live radio broadcasts for every game, live scores, postgame video recaps, league news, and even Twitter updates. Sorry, naked photos of Greg Oden not included. $10
2/ GOOGLE SKY
Relax, Copernicus, while Google turns your phone into a window to the stars. Utilizing your GPS locale, this app can show you the stars, planets, and constellations in whatever area of the sky you point your phone. When you correctly ID Perseus and Pleiades, your girl might show you her
Gemini twins. FREE
3/ RINGDROID
Stop wasting your money downloading obnoxious Lady Gaga ringtones. With the Ringdroid you can create classy custom ringers, notifications, and alarms by editing preexisting MP3, WAV, and
AMR audio files on your phone, which means you can cut Alicia Keys catmoaning from your favorite rap songs. FREE