The Hamisphere

Origin: Spain
Genre: Ham

Cured so it’s buttery in texture and taste. Less fatty than prosciutto. Slice, put in mouth, wash down with malbec. Repeat until fat.

2 / Sopressata

Origin: Southern Italy
Genre: Pork salame

Sopressata is cured, packed with peppercorns, and pressed. Skip pepperoni and sub in this tangy stuff on pizza, fancy boy.

3 / Bresaola

Origin: Lombardy, Italy
Genre: Beef salame

Sweet and earthy, this cured eye of round salame melts on the tongue. Feed lovingly to Chianti-sauced gondoliers.

4 / Corned Beef

Origin: England
Genre: Beef brisket

Brine-cured and pressure-cooked brisket. Stack it a mile high on Jewish rye with mustard. (FYI: Reubens are for suckers.)

5 / Mortadella

Origin: Italy

Genre: Pork salame

Bologna’s smoky cousin, this ground pork is studded with fat and pistachios. Sounds gross, tastes spicy. Time to play hide the salame in your mouth!

6 / Capicola

Origin: Southern Italy
Genre: Pork salame

Called “gabagool” by any self-respecting Italian-American, this smoky stuff is seasoned with red wine, garlic, and paprika. Grill with cheese.

7 / Prosciutto

Origin: Northern Italy
Genre: Ham

Ribbons of heavenly hog fat ripple through this cured, salty staple, making it the most versatile of deli meats. It pairs with fruit, mixes with spicy pasta, and perfects a hoagie. It also knows seven languages and totally slept with your girl.

8 / Pastrami

Origin: Eastern Europe
Genre: Beef brisket

Pressure-cooked brisket with a pepper, coriander, and paprika crust. Kick it Old Testament–style: rye, spicy mustard, and Mom’s guilt trip. L’Chaim!

Origin: Spain

Genre: Ham

Think Spanish prosciutto. At $12/oz., savor this velvet-red nosh with Manchego and your credit counselor.

Origin: Italy
Genre: Pork belly

This cured, pepper-laced awesomeness is Italian bacon. Fry in iron skillet, then cook eggs in the rendered fat for an instant heart attack.

Internet Pork: David Chang, the James Beard Foundation Award-Winning Chef, Founder of Momofuku in NYC, and demon of vegans everywhere, picks his favorite e-mail order hams.

Smoked: Benton’s Smoky Mountain Ham, whole ham, $65, bentonshams.com
Unsmoked: Broadbent’s, 10-pound bone-in ham, $75, broadbenthams.com
Aged: Col. Bill Newsom’s Aged Kentucky Country Ham, 15-pound one-year-aged ham, $75, newsomscountryham.com