Advent Rising

Over budget and years behind schedule, Advent Rising appeared on track to become the Ishtar of video games. But once you start dodging white-hot laser fire in slow motion, you won’t give a rat’s ass how long you’ve been waiting for it. As outer space tough guy Gideon Wyeth, your destiny is to do battle with the Seekers, an alien race hellbent on turning you into space dust. The game’s unique flick-targeting system—“flick” the right control stick towards an enemy and you’re automatically locked on—takes some getting used to, but actually frees up the triggers and face buttons, meaning you’ve got plenty of options when it’s time to dole out ass-bootings. Dodging and cartwheeling through the air with your guns blazing makes for some brutal, satisfying gameplay, and it’s only the first in a proposed trilogy. Let’s just hope we’re not all soiling ourselves from our posh Florida retirement condos by the time part two comes out.