Salt Lake 2002

Between Bob Costas’ self-righteous rants and “events” like Curling, nothing is more agonizing than watching the Winter Olympics. Except maybe a video game based on them. This multi-event crapfest manages to combine all the fun of a pipe-fitting seminar with the pain of slamming your hand in a car door. Whether you’re skiing or luging, competitions are won by contorting your fingers in a Twister-like manner or by pounding the buttons faster than your opponent. Even hardened masochists couldn’t recommend this much punishment on your digits. Unless, of course, you don’t mind competing in the Special Olympics four years from now.