Stretch Panic

At long last, our wet dreams have been answered: Stretch Panic is a psychedelic game where the goal is to—get this—grab women’s breasts (and snap them back into place). It’s the perfect cross-breeding of Super Mario Brothers and Hooters! And these boobs aren’t normal ones, either. They’re big enough to make most porn stars cry with envy (and you with delight.) Before you hop in the car to buy 10 copies and a tube of K-Y jelly, be warned that the cartoon women aren’t very hot (or, um, real), so make sure you put on your beer goggles, too.