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Halloween

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HALLOWEEN HALL OF FAME

halloweenVxmas_nightmareBeforeChristmas.jpgThe Nightmare Before Christmas
Battle: Jack Skellington and his horde of creepy-looking Halloween-themed clay figures vs. Santa and his horde of creepy-looking Christmas-themed clay figures
How it goes down: Jack's plan to kidnap Santa and snatch all of his peppermint-scented glory looks like it's going to work out, until, in the grand tradition of cheesy Christmas stop animation, he has a change of heart and sells out his own culture in the name of eggnog and shiny ribbon.

Advantage: Christmas

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Black Christmas

Battle: A sorority house full of attractive young people vs. an escaped mental patient that's keen on stabbing
How it goes down: The sorority sisters put up a better fight than we could've expected, but in the end it's hard to concentrate on enjoying your eggnog when someone is throwing a plastic bag over your face and stabbing out your eye. And any Christmas that ends with someone beating up someone else while shouting, "Merry Christmas, you fucker!" over and over again probably won't make it into the scrapbook.

Advantage:
Halloween



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Silent Night, Deadly Night

Battle: A psychopath who dresses up like Santa and kills people due to his traumatic past vs. some bullies and some nuns
How it goes down: Normally, bad guys in Christmas movies are touched by the holiday spirit and curb their urges to kill everything that's smiling. Lucky for the Halloween camp, Billy—or Santa, if you will—doesn't have a soft spot and kills a ton of people in very gruesome ways rather than wimping out like that stupid Grinch.

Advantage:
Halloween



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Gremlins

Battle: A horde of evil gremlins with an affinity for sight gags vs. Billy Peltzer and the friendly townspeople of Kingston Falls
How it goes down: Had Billy been smart and thrown Gizmo directly into the microwave as soon as his father brought it into the house this one would've been a no-brainer. But in the end the townspeople finally get the best of the gross little guys by luring them to the community swimming pool and electrocuting the hell out of them.

Advantage:
Christmas




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Scrooged

Battle: Surly Christmas ghosts vs. a grumpy TV exec, played by Bill Murray
How it goes down: Bill Murray's character goes from a ruthless, money-obsessed suit to a softhearted pushover that sings "Put a Little Love in Your Heart" during the closing credits. Even Bobcat Goldthwait is happy at the end of the flick, and we're pretty sure that he's Jewish.

Advantage:
Christmas



Verdict
It was a hard-fought battle, but in the end Christmas wins out 3–2. There's still plenty of time for Halloween to catch up, though, as it's foolish to think Hollywood will run out of crappy holiday movie ideas anytime soon. And if Eli Roth ever gets around to actually making a full feature out of his amazing Grindhouse trailer for Thanksgiving, we'll have yet another holiday to throw into the mix.

Winner: Christmas