Headband Punisher
(Spider-Man cartoon series, 1994)
For the animated Spidey series, the Punisher got a bit of a makeover and, apparently, disco is the new black. Donning gray tights, a trenchcoat, and a John Travolta-in-Perfect headband, Frank Castle looked less like a crazed vigilante and more like the guy who bought X from in the coatroom of the Palladium.




Venom Punisher
(Marvel Comics What If… #44)
In the most coldly calculated marketing move since Wolverine inexplicably held memberships in the X-Men, The Avengers, X-Force, and the fucking Jonas Brothers simultaneously, Marvel decided to mix fan favorite villain Venom with fan-favorite villain killer Punisher. The result? Venom. With guns. Wow. Definitely a storyline worth pursuing there, guys.




Riverdale Punisher
OK, so Marvel does have a sense of humor about ol' Frank. In the team-up no one wanted to see because no one thought it possible, the Punisher tracks a drug dealer to Riverdale—home of Archie, Jughead, and the titillation twins, Betty and Veronica. Cornball innocence coming head to head with street justice hasn't worked this well since the ultra-violent director's cut of Pleasantville.




Supernatural Punisher
(Marvel Knights The Punisher #1, 1998)
The Punisher should be the most no-brainer character of all time: Vietnam vet loses his mind, gets guns. Cue criminal brains on alley walls. But in the late '90s, it was decided that the Punisher needed to be… an undead agent of demonic forces who can "will" a supernatural version of any weapon he desires simply by reaching into his "enchanted" trenchcoat. (cough)




She-Punisher
(Punisher 2099 #19, 1993)
Opting for a little Doc Brown action, this series took Punisher into the future to see how his life would be different. Would he fight robot mobsters? Use laser guns? Be a talking chimp? Well, one thing we found out was that, a hundred years from now, a Puni-she stalks the night. Calling herself Vendetta, she has a similar M.O. to Castle, except the eyes on her costume's skull bulge out a bit further.




Captain Punisher
(Punisher War Journal #9, 2007)
Following the death of Captain America (by a sniper's bullet—so, it took the bad guys since World War II to figure that one out?), Frank Castle temporarily dons his own version of the Patriot's costume. This makes sense—Captain America embodied what America used to be: Proud, forthright, courageous, and inspiring. Captain Ameri-sher embodies what America is: Heavily-armed, belligerent, psychotic, and a constant danger to himself and others. God bless.




Kid-Friendly Punisher
(Marvel Super Hero Squad, Hasbro)
Who better than Marvel heroes to teach your toddler valuable lessons like, "Always help others"? Or, "Don't let adversity keep you from achieving your goals." Or "When your last shred of humanity has been torn away by a mobster's bullet, fall back on your military training and inherent bloodlust to unleash a torrent of fiery death on everyone you deem even tangentially guilty."




Bear Punch Punisher
(The Punisher Vol. 3 #4, 2000)
The Punisher has used every weapon known to man: Guns, knives, bazookas, surface-to-air missiles. But sometimes, when you find yourself in the polar bear pit at the local zoo, you just have to smack a bitch, you know? "Hey, crooks—the Punisher kills bad guys." "Yawn. So what?" "Um, the Punisher also knocks out bears with one punch." "OK, you've got our attention…"