The life of a superhero is fraught with all kinds of dangers: Unironed shirts, unpolished shoes, and unmade beds—it's a nightmare! Luckily, many of them have the brains and resources to do something about it. Namely, hire some other poor schmuck to deal with it.

 

Iron Man/The Avengers
Butler: Edwin Jarvis
Relationship: Stressful. Cleaning up after serial womanizer and serial booze-upchucker Stark is tough enough, but you try preparing a dinner for an unfrozen super soldier, a mutant witch, an angry scientist, and a fucking Norse god on top of it.

 


Tom Strong
Butler: Pneuman
Relationship: Artificial. "Science Hero" Strong isn't going to tool around with just any old codger in a tux. No, his man must be a cross between Jeeves, C-3PO, and RoboCop. He won't get all warm and mushy with you, but at least he's efficient and comes with an off switch.

 


Screw-On Head
Butler: Mr. Groin
Relationship: Distant. Because Screw-On Head is a robot with, well, replaceable heads, you can forgive him for not getting too attached to his ever-helpful butler, Mr. Groin. You can also forgive him for not wanting to get too close to anyone named "Mr. Groin."

 


Dr. Strange
Butler: Wong
Relationship: Suspicious. Strange is a single "wizard" living in Greenwich Village who is partial to silk robes and Asian "manservants." Uh-huh. We get it. Not that there's, you know, anything wrong with that. Just do what you do, man. It's cool.

 

Richie Rich
Butler: Cadbury
Relationship: Surrogate Fatherly. OK, so Rich isn't technically a superhero, but he's enormously wealthily. All it takes is for some goon to gun his parents down and he'll be taking back the night before you know it. And like all wealthy children, he'll grow up knowing more about Cadbury than he will his own parents.

 

Batman
Butler: Alfred Pennyworth
Relationship: Rock solid. The OG Superhero/Butler match-up, Bats and 'Fred have been kicking since back in the day. Whenever Bruce Wayne needs a sandwich, a batmobile tune-up, or someone to explain to the Child Welfare Office what the hell is up with Robin, Alfred is there.