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Kris Humphries Is Having The Worst Week Ever

Having a rough week at work? Got into a big fight with your girlfriend? Can’t find that $20 bill you swear you had in your wallet? Don’t worry; these are things to celebrate in comparison to what Kris Humphries has been going through. Having your wife file for divorce after a mere 72-day marriage without consulting you first is pretty shitty but finding out about it through TMZ is even shittier. And that’s just one reason Humphries is having the worst week ever. Here are five more.


He got scammed- not just by the Kardashians.
Over the weekend it was reported that Humphries was the victim of an investment fraud, and that the guy who scammed out of these hundreds of thousands of dollars was actually a guest at the big wedding!

He didn’t get to celebrate Halloween.
He wasn’t invited to Kim’s New York party on Saturday night and he was probably weeping in his childhood bedroom out in Minnesota on Monday. Poor guy.

He has to relive his mistake over and over again.
E! is still airing ‘Kim’s Fairytale Wedding,’- at least it was last night when I got to watch for the first time with a wonderful degree of schadenfreude. And when E! finally has the good taste to take it off the air, Kris has a whole season of Kourtney and Kim Take New York to look forward to, documenting the time he spent in the Big Apple as a newlywed. It premieres November 27 so still plenty of time to edit him into looking like a total dick.

He’s going to lose Twitter pals!
As of today Kris only follows 51 people on Twitter, which is basically the Kardashian’s extended family. His hasn’t been on Twitter since Kim filed for divorce and sadly the last batch of people he’s tweeted at are her family members.

He’s out of a job.
With the NBA lockout still in full swing he’s going to feel the pain of a missed paycheck soon, since players are generally paid bi-monthly November 15 to May 1 not to mention he doesn’t even have a specific team to return to once it ends given he’s a free agent. Plus there’s no rule that he has to receive the $2 million engagement ring back from Kim so he may not even receive a little consolation cash.