As you probably noticed, Hollywood seems to be taking a break from new ideas and digging through their box of movies from decades past, reworking them to take another shot at creating box-office hits. With this in mind, we thought of ten movies that we think should be dusted off and remade. Some of these movies were hits from the get-go, while others had no business being put on screen in the first place. Here’s our list of some military-themed films that the powers-that-be in Tinseltown should take a crack at during their hiatus of creativity.
Navy SEALs (1990)
Great subject matter, but if you’ve seen this tragedy, you know that the corny meter was off the charts. I’m still a Charlie Sheen fan, despite the fact his charm has been wearing thin lately, but his performance in this flick was beyond terrible. Maybe it was because of the insane amount of drugs he was on, or maybe he just sucks at dramatic roles (easy on the hate-mail, that's just my opinion). Whatever the case was, this movie was a disgrace to all true SEALs, and we’d like to see Gary Sinise step up and start the ball rolling on a real tribute film.
Delta Force (1986)
Lee Marvin and Chuck Norris were men’s men to the generation who grew up watching them, and today Chuck remains a favorite of military members. However, this 80’s movie was done in the typical style of sappy melodrama; nothing like what the real Delta Force would be (let’s pretend we know what they’re like). With the recent slaying of Osama Bin Laden at the hands of the Navy SEALs and members of the “non-existent” Delta Force, this flick is one remake that would be sure to rake in the dough.
Top Gun (1986)
No question about it, this movie was my favorite one growing up. I envisioned myself hanging out with Goose and getting inverted with Kelly McGillis. Fantasies aside, this movie needs a remake, and a modern-day version of this film could really come alive with the advances in special-effects technology. Picture watching Top Gun 3D, featuring Maverick and Goose flying an F-35C, with 3D glasses and some kickass THX sound, and then tell me who wouldn’t go see that movie!
The iconic image of Sgt. Elias (Willem Dafoe) recreating the actual image of a 1968 photo by Art Greenspon is recognized everywhere as a symbol of that war gone wrong. This movie is a cult-classic and a must-see for any future service member. Having won four Academy Awards, including Best Picture and Best Director for Ollie Stone, this film now needs a redux focusing on the war of our generation in Afghanistan. It would be a tough job, so I suggest going to Mr. Stone himself, but ask nicely, as he’s a bit unhinged (most geniuses are).
Arnold Schwarzenegger and Alyssa Milano: what more could a guy ask for? This movie became both a critical and commercial success as the seventh highest grossing film of 1985. Our suggestion for the replacement of Ms. Milano would be the temptress Megan Fox (who wouldn’t risk life and limb for her sake?). As for Arnold’s replacement, we think the Rock would do perfectly.
This timeless classic spurred one of the best TV comedy-drama series ever, which won 14 Emmys and a Peabody Award. The film itself was nominated for five academy awards, winning an Oscar for best screenplay. It could be easily rewritten to focus on the war in Iraq or Afghanistan, instead of Korea. Now, there are rumors that one is in the works, but regardless if they’re true or not, we’d love to see this movie remade! Get to it, Mr. Hanks!
Tora! Tora! Tora! (1970)
We all saw the movie Pearl Harbor (2001), which was completely botched by Michael Bay (that’s what you get when Disney foots the bill and then calls the shots). Don’t get me wrong, we aren’t disputing the fact that the digital effects were cool, but when December 7th went down, it was absolute mayhem. Since Pearl Harbor (the Disney film) was made recently, Tora! Tora! Tora! is primed for a remake the right way, with the actual veterans lending their knowledge. Do our Pearl Harbor veterans justice, before they are forever lost to the ages of time, and remake this film as a final tribute to the Greatest Generation.
The Green Berets (1968)
For those of you that have seen this movie, we know, it was awful, but no military movie list would be complete without The Duke. The Green Berets were instrumental in the Vietnam War; however, Hollywood botched this flick, and it became one of the most hated films of the 20th Century. With the increased amount of exposure and national interest in Special Forces today—as well as the fact that this movie was such a screw-up the first time around—this is a perfect fit for the list.
The Dirty Dozen (1967)
One of the all-time greats for military movies, I can remember watching this movie with my grandfather and him telling me how many of the guys in the movie were actually veterans of World War II, including Charles Bronson and Earnest Borgnine (ask your parents who they are). Although the original movie was nominated for four Academy Awards, the sequels and remakes in the 80’s, as made-for-TV movies, tried to profit from the original popularity of the film and fell flat on their face. This movie is primed, then, for a modern face-lift, and should be redone for a new generation of fans.
The classic romantic tale of Casablanca, with the beautiful Ingrid Bergman, set in the early days of WWII, would be perfect for one of today’s iconic Hollywood couples to take on, for instance Brad and Angelina. As Ali Al Salem and Kuwait City are the new gateway to the conflicts in Iraq and Afghanistan, this location would prove to be a perfect site for a new set of refugees leaving Afghanistan or Iraq, instead of Morocco. At the very least, it would definitely be worth a study to see how an updated version of this classic would be received, so play it again, Sam.
See the ones that just didn't quite make the cut at www.GraffitiofWar.com