Forget your torture porn, your lame remakes, or your godawul PG-13 wankfests—the trailers for horror movies of yesterday were better and scarier than anything we get now.
Friday the 13th From the "ch-ch-ch...ha-ha-ha" soundtrack to the shrieking violin strings to the creepy-as-fuck voiceover guy, this pretty much sums up what was great about '80s horror.
Halloween Eat it, Rob Zombie. Seriously.
Mother's Day Is it possible for a movie to give you the heebie jeebies, debilitating nausea, and an STD all at the same time? Yep. And it's called this one.
The Texas Chainsaw Massacre Once again, never underestimate the power of a creepily calm voiceover. This trailer is a like a home movie you were never, ever meant to see.
Sleepaway Camp This trailer guy is especially unsettling, because of the perverse pleasure that's palpable in his voice when he says things like, "You won't be coming home." Why so jolly?