Line: "Now look, petal. Faithful is my middle name." –Kegan (Krull, 1983)
Lesson: This one is a no-brainer, fellas. In fact, we'd be shocked if you hadn't used this line already. All men are faithful at all times, because A) Sex doesn't count if she doesn't know the girl B) Strip clubs are like the Negative Zone where no earthly rules apply and C) Oral isn't cheating. It's the law. One of our presidents OK'd it.


Line: "Power is when you have every justification to kill, and we don't." –Oskar Schindler (Schindler's List, 1993)
Lesson: Remember this one for your next department meeting when that over-eager junior sales associate—you know, the one who thinks asking endless inane questions qualifies as "showing initiative"—is mid-ramble and you've got a freshly-sharpened pencil aimed at his cornea. Show restraint. It's the Neeson way.


Line: "You're a thief, a murderer, and a violator of women… If I had known earlier you would have been dead sooner." –Rob Roy (Rob Roy, 1995)
Lesson: Keep this is mind before clicking "Accept" on that mysterious Facebook Friend Request. Ask yourself: "Just how well do I know this person? Do I dare give them access to those photos from my 30th birthday party or, god forbid, my wacky status updates?"


Line: "Next time, we won't play by their rules. We'll invent our own!" –Michael Collins (Michael Collins, 1996)
Lesson: Three words: Office Softball Team. You don't technically lose if the other time has no idea that each base is now worth 10 runs and any ball picked up off the ground is an out. Get ready for a record-setting year!


Line: "There's always a bigger fish." –Qui-Gon Jinn (Star Wars: Episode 1 - The Phantom Menace, 1999)
Lesson: Your ex-girlfriend's new guy has porn experience. A zen-like calm is the only way to get over it.


Line: "No, son, never. The blood stays on the blade. One day you'll understand." –Priest Vallon (Gangs of New York, 2002)
Lesson: Duh. When you stab someone, leave the blood on the blade. Obvs.


Line: "We need Kate. We need Leo. And we need them now." –Daniel (Love Actually, 2003)
Lesson: This one has niche appeal—the only people adhereing to this bit of advice are studio executives trying to find a way to sell their obscure art house movie based on a novel.


Line: "Everybody's sin is nobody's sin, and everybody's crime is no crime at all." –Alfred Kinsey (Kinsey, 2004)
Lesson: Know those pictures of your boss you took during that last senior retreat week in Vegas? Hold onto them. They are the best "Get Out of Jail Free" card you could possibly imagine.


Line: "You are not what you were born, but what you have it in yourself to be." –Godfrey of Ibelin (Kingdom of Heaven, 2005)
Lesson: In other words, if you find yourself crying during Extreme Makeover: Home Edition, worry about water weight, and calling your buddies every night "just to chat," then just take a deep breath and accept that you are not what you were born to be. Schedule that operation and name change, pronto.


Line: "The training is nothing! The will is everything! The will to act!" –Henri Ducard/Ra's Al Ghul (Batman Begins, 2005)
Lesson: So what if that dude is an MMA champion who just happens to be touchy about dudes hitting on his girlfriend—don't back down. Your will is as strong as his… enormous… perfectly skull-crushing-sized hands. Right? Right?!?


Line: "Things never happen the same way twice, dear one." –Aslan (The Chronicles of Narnia: Prince Caspian, 2008)
Lesson: So that new girl in accounting has given you a phony number, "misplaced" your e-mail, work number, cell number, and home address, stood you up at a bar, stood you up at a resturant, introduced you to her fiance, and quit her job and moved. She's out of options, buddy. Now's your chance to make it happen!


Line: "I don't know who you are. I don't know what you want. If you are looking for ransom, I can tell you, I don't have money. But what I do have are a very particular set of skills; skills I have acquired over a very long career. Skills that make me a nightmare for people like you. If you let my daughter go now, that'll be the end of it. I will not look for you, I will not pursue you. But if you don't, I will look for you, I will find you, and I will kill you." –Bryan Mills, (Taken, 2009)
Lesson: Don't ever fuck with Liam Neeson.