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Drag Me to Hell

Release Date: 
05/29/2009
Rated: 
MPAA: PG-13
Star Rating: 
7 out of 10
Directed by: Sam Raimi

The Skinny: If there's one lesson this horror movie teaches, it's never deny a loan extension to a gypsy crone. Making amends for his universally reviled superhero train wreck Spider-Man 3, Sam Raimi returns to his roots and rustles up a fright flick about an ambitious farm girl (a perky and game Alison Lohman) who decides to screw over a kindly old woman…who then curses our hero. The curse is simple—three days of spooky, supernatural harassment and then demons drag you to hell. Seriously. It's right there in the title.

The Good: Don't let the PG-13 rating throw you: there might not be alot of gore, but there are disturbingly enormous amounts of just about every other bodily fluid. Equal parts 80's horror movie montage, and antidote to torture porn and the turgid ghost stories that plague contemporary horror, Drag Me To Hell is a rip-snorting nail-biter that you will take seriously, even as the flick refuses to take itself seriously. The special effects, camera work, and the aforementioned effluvia all combine into one freaky-ass circus of WTF.

The Bad: Some of you might think the movie is corny, or too tongue in cheek, or hell, maybe you're eagerly awaiting Saw 8 or 7, because you love the predictability of a convoluted death trap. You might be one of these people. If you are, you suck.

Tantalizing Tidbit: You will know fear…of dentures.

Theater, DVD or TNT in Five Years: Definitely the theater. There are enough jumps, jolts, and freaky unexpected twists that it's almost a requirement it be seen in a packed theater of shrieking people. And take a date. It's not a gross-out flick, it's just straight up scary. She will love it.