If you prefer Sith Lords to Cinderella, Count Dooku to Prince Charming, and Alderaan to Aladdin, then you will want to get yourself down to Orlando, Florida from August 12th to the 15th. Because that weekend, Star Wars Celebration V will be taking over Disney's home court for a massive con feting (see what we did there?) the 30th Anniversary of (arguably) the greatest Star Wars film of all: The Empire Strikes Back.
So what exactly can you expect from the show besides fake Biggs Darklighter mustaches and ill-advised slave Leia costumes? So much more…
With the reticent bounty hunter at the center of the celebration, it's only fitting that fans get to act out their own Boba Fet-ishes. Celebration V is offering up the "Bounty Hunt" challenge - essentially, a large-scale scavenger hunt where attendees can register teams (but hurry up, registration ends Aug. 5) and compete to win Hutt-sized prizes. We hear carbonite Han Solos fit well into cargo holds, but you have to jimmy them a bit.
"I love you." "I know."
If you manage to convince your girlfriend to spend her precious vacation days flying down to Florida and dressing up as Mon Mothma, you just have to marry that one. And Celebration will not let these prize catches slip between your fingers. Star Wars-themed wedding chapels will be present, allowing for the quickest nuptials this side of Vegas. Just, um, be sure you're not related first.
In Through the Endor
Hey, it's Orlando. You didn't think Disney was going to sit this one out, did you? The classic "Star Tours" ride is going to be shutting its doors at the end of the year to allow for a complete revamp, so Disney is allowing Celebration attendees a unique chance to ride the original one last time. Dubbed "Last Tour to Endor," the event features a fireworks show and a Death Star Disco (ten bucks you hear this at least eight times). Endor hasn't rocked this hard since Chief Chirpa grabbed the wrong pipe.
The Greatest Swag Item Of All Time
A scant 400 lucky fans will get their hands on one (or more) of 16 exclusive mini-cereal boxes, one given away at each panel event. With incredible art and even better names (Raisin Han, Troop Loops), these are the must-have items of Celebration V. Seriously, we want all of them.
What better way to show your love for R5-D4 than to get the malfunctioning little twerp etched into your skin? Head over to the Celebration Tattoo Pavilion and let a world-renowned tattoo artist create a unique (and permanent) work of Star Wars art on your body. There will also be a "Star Wars Tattoo Show" were you can ogle the tats of other committed fans. Just remember, there are three "y's" in Kashyyyk.
Lucas v. Stewart
It is being called "The Main Event," and with good reason. The news world's sharpest, most bullshit-cutting-throughingest, and funniest interviewer faces his toughest challenge yet: The soft spoken, bearded creator of all that is Star Wars. Yes, that's right, George Lucas himself sits down for a complete and utter grilling at the hands of The Daily Show's Jon Stewart. Attendees can even submit questions that Stewart may read live during the event. Will Lucas Force-choke the host for one too many Kit Fisto jokes? Or will Stewart break through Lucas' forcefield and finally get an apology for Jar Jar? One thing is for sure - you have to be there to see it go down.
Not to mention special appearances by Star Wars alums (Mark Hamill!), costume contests, and much, much more. We'll, of course, have more from the event once our Bothan spies return…