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The Crocodile Hunter: Collision Course

Release Date: 
Friday, July 12, 2002
Rated: 
MPAA: PG
Star Rating: 
★½
Ever since “That’s not a knife…this is a knife,” there’s been a severe drought in the classic Australians-are-different-than-Americans comedy. The first of its kind since Paul Hogan made that ill-fated trip to Los Angeles, Collision Course, sadly, doesn’t succeed much more than its predecessors.

Hunter is made up of everyone’s favorite crazy-guy-who-fucks-with-scary-animals, Steve Irwin, as he goes about his usual business—transplanting crocodiles into safer environments, capturing spiders for study, and grabbing venomous snakes by the tail and pissing them off. These segments play like his television show and aren’t entirely unamusing. The same can’t be said for the rest of the film. A loosely constructed storyline sets the CIA on a mission to recover a missing black box from a fallen U.S. satellite—a black box that has found its way into the unsuspecting hands of Irwin and his wife via a crocodile (don’t bother to ask). Poor dubbing and even worse acting make the scenes without dangerous Australian wildlife unbearable. Instead of staying with the interesting material—Irwin and his high jinks—the movie becomes a bad action flick. Stick with Animal Planet and a good copy of Mr. Hogan’s original classic.