The World's Strongest Coffee Is Now Available In America, And We'll Never Sleep Again

This bonkers brew has more than triple the caffeine of your weak-ass morning Starbucks.
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This bonkers brew has more than triple the caffeine of your weak-ass morning Starbucks.
(Photo: Getty)

(Photo: Getty)

Talk about an eye-opener. 

A new coffee that just hit the United States is guaranteed to be the strongest cup of joe you'll ever taste.

Black Insomnia Coffee, which debuted in South Africa last year, packs a ridiculously caffeinated wallop. According to creator Sean Kristafor, the absurdly strong java jams 702 milligrams of caffeine into just 12 ounces. Compare that to a Tall Starbucks Pike Place, which has just 230 milligrams.

black insomnia coffee

Fox News breaks down Black Insomnia's demonically jacked-up power even further here:

According to the coffee company, the makers sent bags of its coffee to a Swiss-based laboratory to confirm its claims as the world’s strongest brew. Samples were then tested via liquid chromatography (the separation of a mixture by passing it in a solution) and Black Insomnia was the strongest of those reviewed with 17.5 grams of caffeine per kilogram of coffee.

By comparison, “Death Wish” coffee was evaluated as having 13.2 grams per kilogram, while WodFee (marketed as the “world’s strongest coffee blend with added caffeine”) had 13.8 grams. A dark roast from Starbucks has around 5 grams of caffeine per kilogram, approximately.

(Photo: Getty)

(Photo: Getty)

Meanwhile, Grub Street reports that Black Insomnia is preparing to do battle with other brands to declare worldwide ultra-caffeinated supremacy.

Black Insomnia’s team knows that lab tests or not, that won’t be the end of this battle for the “most caffeinated” title. In fact, “nine different brands on Amazon” (they counted) all claim some form of the title right now — which is why they’re also attempting to cut rivals off at the pass.

The company explains Black Insomnia’s caffeine levels were actually cut back in order to, you know, keep consumers alive. The caffeine level still “borders on narcotic,” but it warns no brand with any sense would “attempt to surpass this content in the interest of public health and safety.”

Holy crap. Black Insomnia is available in 16-ounce bags online, if you got the balls.