This season fans at the Dolphins’ Sun Life Stadium can pay an extra $5 to sit in the shade. What other ticket offers are on the horizon?
Detroit Lions
All fans who can correctly spell and pronounce the name of rookie DT Ndamukong Suh—on the first try—get $10 off admission.
Cincinnati Bengals
All ex-cons who have shared a prison cell with a current Bengal player get $15 off admission. (Limit 200 fans per game.)
Green Bay Packers
Adult males with a resting heart rate below 80 beats per minute get half off a bratwurst at the Munch Zone at Lambeau Field.
Cleveland Browns
For an extra $10, fans are guaranteed an obstructed-view seat so they don’t have to see Jake Delhomme throw a pick six into the flat.
Buffalo Bills
For an extra $10, fans are guaranteed an obstructed-view seat so they don’t have to see Ryan Fitzpatrick throw a pick six into the flat.
Oakland Raiders
Raider Nation in Sections 340–350 of the upper bowl get their seats wiped down by former number one pick and current usher JaMarcus Russell.
St. Louis Rams
For their new “Let’s Rebuild Together!” campaign, any fan who can run a 4.55-second 40 and execute a buttonhook gets to start at wide receiver!