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3D TV is a Game Changer

Are you worried that you're not spending enough time watching sports in a slack-jawed haze?

The magical wonders of a 3D TV system may be just the thing to keep you transfixed on the couch until bed sores develop. All you need is several thousand bucks to drop on a 3D set and glasses, and perhaps a willingness to wear a diaper so as to avoid those time-consuming trips to the bathroom.

DIRECTV is betting that 3D will eventually blow up like HD did, and recently added ESPNHD and three new channels devoted exclusively to 3D content. Tuesday's MLB All-Star Game was the first ever broadcast in 3D on the satellite network, and the difference was dramatic: foul balls pinged wildly off screen, players seemingly wandered into your living room, and the impressive depth perception made the pitcher's mound look as touchable as a bump on a stripper's freshly-razored bikini line. (Trust us, this is a good thing).

Yankees manager Joe Girardi, who skippered the American League team, predicted 3D will be more than just another mode of time-suckage during a visit to the DIRECTV/Panasonic luxury box at Anaheim Stadium. “It's a great scouting tool,” he told “You can see the depth of the pitches and the trajectory better. You get a better sense of where the ball is actually going. I think it's wonderful.”

And this is just baseball. Just wait until football and basketball go 3D. Watching sports could soon be like “Avatar"..... only with balls!