Kyle Turley
Not only is the tattooed Turley utterly frightening, but he's also a good teammate. After the Jets' Damien Robinson grabbed Aaron Brooks by the face mask, a huge pileup ensued. The scrum ended with Turley emerging from the pile (somehow) holding Robinson's helmet, which he promptly threw across the field before he gave the Meadowlands the finger. Turley was fined 25 large, but, damn, he got his money's worth.


Mike Ditka
Coach Ditka would probably like to forget his days at the helm of the Saints, but we won't let him. Back in '99, the Saints were on the visitors' one-yard line with 12 seconds left in the half and, amazingly, didn't score. Irate fans let Ditka hear it, and he gave it back with a couple of obscene gestures and shouted obscenities. Much to our surprise, the $20,000 penalty was Ditka's first fine as a coach.




Tom Brady
The Patriots' golden boy can win all the championships and sleep with all the supermodels he wants, but it doesn't mean Brady knows how to put on his helmet properly. That's right, a few months ago Tom Terrific was fined an undisclosed amount for not having his chin properly strapped. What? Is Bill Belichick not setting a law-abiding example in Foxboro?

Fred Smoot
You didn't think we'd forget the Vikings' Love Boat cruise, did you? Smoot was fined one game check ($82,352) for his involvement in the infamous incident that forever linked Lake Minnetonka and K-Y Jelly. Bonus punishment: In court, Smoot pleaded guilty to "being a public nuisance on a watercraft," which is officially our new favorite crime.