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| Uh-oh¿looks like Kobe's gonna have to change at halftime. |
In yet another effort by David Stern to rule the universe, the league is looking to ban those adorable tights so popular among the NBA's elite. This doesn't just affect high-profile pantyhose wearers like LeBron James, Kobe Bryant, and Dennis Rodman. It's also harming the lesser known, and older, tights wearers like Jerry Stackhouse and Joe Smith, guys who need the compression tights to keep creaky joints fresh by increasing circulation. Unfortunately, those facts won't get in the way of uniformity, and a ban on leggings is set to start next season. Here's hoping by then the players will have all sorts of new accessories for their legs, like, oh, I don't know¿
- Higher socks
- 'Do rags
- Prince's new album title (in purple paint)
- Cornrowed leg hair
- Tattoos¿of leg tights
- 48-inch rims
- Ads for goldenpalace.com
- Dress code approved slacks
- Fishnets
- The Clear or the Cream
- Canceled endorsement checks from tights companies
- Allen Iverson elbow sleeves (although those might be banned by then, too)
- Nothing¿who needs to keep their legs warm when they're on the injured list with a leg problem?