Everything you need to appear knowledgeable about March Madness. Er, at least the teams that could actually win.
Remember a time when the NCAA had balls and actually limited the number of teams that deserved invites to the tourney? According to Drexel University's Math Forum, the current 64-team format means each year's bracket has over nine quintillion possible outcomes. That's over nine quintillion ways for the receptionist in your office who picks on the basis of team cuteness to win your company's bracket pool. So, for nostalgia's sake—and because we’re tired and this is boring—we present to you the top 23 remaining teams in college basketball.
NORTH CAROLINA
Record: 31-2 (14-2 ACC)
What’s to like: One of America’s best point guards in Ty Lawson, and All-American beast Tyler Hansbrough. The Heels are up-tempo with terrific slashers and shooters, and get out on the break off of turnovers, misses and makes.
What’s not to like: Other than the fact that Hansbrough’s face looks regularly as if he’s in the middle of a colonoscopy? Not a whole lot, though they're close-scrape-prone and rank just 10th in the ACC in scoring D.
Bracketability: While often shaky on D, the Heels more than make up for it with the nation's most potent offense. They’ll ride Psycho-T (a.k.a. Tyler Hansbrough) into April.
KANSASRecord: 30-3 (13-3 Big 12)
What’s to like: A balanced offense featuring guards Brandon Rush and Mario Chalmers. More importantly, KU plays stellar defense, ranking at or near the top of the Big 12 in every major category.
What’s not to like: History. As March goes from Lion to Lamb, so does Kansas. It’s been two decades since KU won it all, usually choking somewhere in late March.
Bracketability: Rock, Chalk the Jayhawks more than a few times on your bracket. Who knows? Maybe the 20th anniversary of their last National Championship will prove to be a good-luck charm.
MEMPHISRecord: 33-1 (16-0 SEC)
What’s to like: Guards Chris Douglas-Roberts and Derrick Rose lead the club in scoring—and the Tigers score a lot.
What’s not to like: Memphis is like that intramural team that plays in the “Casual League,” even though it’s stacked with grad students who played D-II ball. Also, they shoot free throws worse than Shaq.
Bracketability: The Tigers only slipped up once this season (Tennessee), but it was the their only real test. W's over USC in the preseason and overrated Georgetown and Gonzaga over winter break do not a champion make. Look for Calipari’s team to go down in a slugfest somewhere in the second weekend.
UCLARecord: 31-3 (16-2 Pac-10)
What’s to like: Even with freshman big-man Kevin Love throwing down a double-double every night, the Bruins still spread the wealth, with four starters scoring in double figures.
What’s not to like: UCLA has won big games—and close games—all season. But they have a tendency to give up the three. Not a great stat to take into the Big Dance, where they could end up playing a bunch of Mark Price wannabes like Drake.
Bracketability: The Bruins have flirted with the title two straight years. They’re not likely to strike out. Keep them in your bracket through April.
GEORGETOWNRecord: 27-5 (15-3 Big East)
What’s to like: True center Roy Hibbert anchors a Princeton-esque offense that can win games in the 50s or 80s. But the Hoyas’ true strength is defense, where they've held the Big East under 70 points per game, and 38 percent from the field.
What’s not to like: Anyone who’s seen Georgetown play, and not just looked at their schedule, would hesitate to make them a two-seed. The Hoyas fail tests like Mel Gibson does breathalyzers.
Bracketability: Georgetown's not a bad team but it's not great, either. They'll lack the fire (and the lucky calls) to make it to the Final Four, getting out-hustled on the second weekend of the tournament.
TENNESSEERecord: 29-4 (14-2 SEC)
What’s to like: Tennessee is truly a program on the rise. Coach Bruce Pearl (love the neon-orange suit) orchestrates this legitimate top-10 team that's fast, aggressive and well-rounded.
What’s not to like: For one, the jovial, yet volatile, Pearl (and that damn neon-orange suit) could turn viciously angry at any point in a game. For another, they’re still learning how to string together big wins. (See: Vanderbilt, SEC Final vs. Arkansas.)
Bracketability: There’s no way they can win six straight, but look for them in the Elite Eight. Maybe, just maybe, Coach Pearl’s sheer (suit) luminescence can will them to the Final Four.
TEXASRecord: 28-5 (13-3 Big 12)
What’s to like: UT lost last year’s best college player, and coach Rick Barnes still took them to the top 10. D.J. Augustin leads a team whose best offense is its defense, forcing bad shots and turnovers.
What’s not to like: Texas is let-down prone, evidenced by its late-season upset loss to Texas Tech, and may lack the long-distance and free-throw shooting necessary against an energized Cinderella late in a game.
Bracketability: Like Tennessee, UT's good enough for the Elite Eight, but probably not the Final Four. Plus, does anyone really want to see alum Roger Clemens’ oversized head bouncing up and down in San Antonio?
WISCONSINRecord: 28-4 (16-2 Big Ten)
What’s to like: Defense. The Badgers don't give up a lot of good shots or points. They bang on the block, rebound, and are stingy with the ball. Big man Brian Butch lives up to his name. (He's a lesbian.)
What’s not to like: Even Hoosiers’ coach Norman Dale (check IMDB, noobs) thinks these guys are boring. Five three-pointers per game won’t cut it against teams from, like, any other conference.
Bracketability: It’s a stretch for the Badgers to make it past the Sweet 16, no matter what they’re ranked in the Big Ten or how many ears of corn Brian Butch can shuck per minute.
XAVIER
Record: 27-6 (14-2 Atlantic 10)
What’s to like: Six players averaging double figures, led by 5-7 fireplug Drew Lavender at point guard. Throw in a ton of experience and Josh Duncan down low, and the Musketeers are primed for a dark horse run.
What’s not to like: The Atlantic 10 isn't exactly a monolith and two losses to St. Joe’s hint at vulnerability. Combine that with a penchant for turnovers, and Xavier could be done early.
Bracketability: The Musketeers are a terrific under-the-radar pick to make you some money in your office pool.
STANFORD
Record: 26-7 (13-5 Pac-10)
What’s to like: F Brook Lopez is a monster. Or is it Robin Lopez; the Cardinal have (literally) twin towers down low combining for nearly 30 PPG. Stanford's three-point D is also tops in the Pac-10.
What’s not to like: They turn the ball over, depend heavily on the Lopez twins for scoring, lack senior leadership, and have managed to lose to USC and UCLA a combined four times this season.
Bracketability: Stanford hasn't put together any of the long, strong win streaks that denote a National Champ. Odds are they won't do it in March, either. This is a Sweet Sixteen team and that's about it.
DUKE
Record: 27-5 (13-3 ACC)
What’s to like: As usual, the Blue Devils are loaded with McDonald’s All-American talent, high IQs and hot three-point shooters. Demarcus Nelson is a grizzled vet leading Duke in points and rebounds.
What’s not to like: Besides the team's all around Dukiness? Unfortunately, their All-American talent doesn't include a big-man who can block shoots, make layups or, god forbid, dunk.
Bracketability: For Duke, it’s simple: make three-pointers or die. Duke will improve on last year’s flop versus VCU in the first round but the Final Four might be a stretch for a relatively young team.
SOUTHERN CALIFORNIA
Record: 21-11 (11-7 Pac-10)
What’s to like: While they’ve been unranked, they pack a powerful scoring punch and a balanced attack, punctuated by frosh star O.J. Mayo ’s 21 points per game.
What’s not to like: The Trojans have had some trouble on the boards and get many of their points from individual efforts, making them vulnerable to particularly tough defenses.
Bracketability: They’re so tough to defend, and make offenses work so hard, they will be a tougher out than their record lets on. Look for them to go as far as the third week, if they stay on their game.
PITTSBURGH
Record: 26-9 (10-8 Big East)
What’s to like: Pitt's much better than its record implies, having survived brutal injuries this year. The key to its success is point guard Levance Fields, who averages almost 5.5 assists per game.
What’s not to like: The Panthers aren't great from the line—three-point or free-throw. They don’t score a ton in general and, in three of their losses, they were held to the low 50s.
Bracketability: Pitt has the explosive power to win four tournament games in a row, and will certainly be underrated heading into the Dance. Watch for the Panthers to head to the second weekend.
DRAKE
Record: 28-4 (15-3 Missouri Valley)
What’s to like: Balanced scoring and rebounding, and they actually shoot the three-pointer—a lot. G Josh Young leads the team in scoring and PG Adam Emmenecker dishes over six assists a game.
What’s not to like: They’re small—really small. Drake’s rebounding leader Jonathan Cox stands at just 6’8”, and every other starter is under 6’5”.
Bracketability: Drake is another great dark horse pick, utilizing the three-pointer to neutralize other teams’ size and rebounding. If the Bulldogs get the right teams, they could end up in the Elite Eight.
CONNECTICUT
Record: 24-8 (13-5 Big East)
What’s to like: Five players scoring in double digits, plus a six-assist point guard in A.J. Price and nine boards a game from Jeff Adrien. They score in a hurry and make opponents take tough shots.
What’s not to like: The Huskies don’t value the basketball. Unlike other top seeds, they turn it over more than their opponents.
Bracketability: If the Huskies can avoid fencing stolen goods long enough to actually play basketball, this could be a dangerous team with the ability to make it to the second or even third weekend.
MICHIGAN STATE
Record: 25-8 (12-6 Big Ten)
What’s to like: It’s March. That means it’s time for Michigan State to rock. Forward Raymar Morgan and senior Drew Neitzel lead the Spartan offense with power and finesse, respectively.
What’s not to like: The Spartans live for the Tournament, but the season has been one of ups and downs. If it seems like every game hinges on whether or not Neitzel is hitting threes, it's 'cause it does.
Bracketability: The Spartans made it to the Big Ten tourney final because they’ve finally got their shooting groove back. This should help them stay hot through the Sweet Sixteen.
NOTRE DAME
Record: 24-7 (14-4 Big East)
What’s to like: The Yeti-like Luke Harangody is the Big East Player of the Year, averaging a double-double. The Irish also make more threes per game and score more points than the rest of the Big East.
What’s not to like: Notre Dame also gives up more points per game than all but one Big East team. Plus, they have a real-life leprechaun mascot—complete with red mutton-chops. Ew.
Bracketability: ND left the tourney early last year, losing to a heady Winthrop team on Day 2. If they don’t play D, it'll be more of the same. Odds are, they'll make it to the Sweet Sixteen (and beyond?).
BUTLER
Record: 29-3 (16-2 Horizon League)
What’s to like: Tournament experience, senior leadership, three-point shooting and classic “Looks like he’s 47 even though he’s only 22” clutch performer A.J. Graves. Mike Green leads in P's, R's and A's.
What’s not to like: Like other feisty mid-majors, they lack the size and athleticism of their BCS brothren. They lean too heavily on great performances from Graves and Green every single game.
Bracketability: Butler will pull off at least three wins before the magic runs out.
MARQUETTE
Record: 24-9 (11-7 Big East)
What’s to like: Marquette spreads its points and rebounds across a guard-oriented, drive-centered offense. They’ll drive the lane for better or worse. Jerel McNeal is their steadiest presence on the floor.
What’s not to like: The Golden Eagles don’t have the power on the boards or on defense to steady an onslaught by a hot team. When crunch time comes, Marquette is likely to cave.
Bracketability: Marquette can, and will, score enough to make it to the second weekend.
CLEMSON
Record: 24-9 (10-6 ACC)
What’s to like: A tough group that's done everything in its power to get in. Beating Duke and playing UNC close in the conference final didn’t hurt. K.C. Rivers leads the team in scoring inside and out.
What’s not to like: Making mistakes when it counts all season. They could have beaten UNC twice, but choked in the clutch. They turn the ball over and go cold when they need points most.
Bracketability: Clemson could go either way, overmatching a less physical team, or more likely collapsing versus a well-disciplined opponent. Despite ACC success, CU falls on the first weekend.
TEXAS A&M
Record: 24-10 (8-8 Big 12)
What’s to like: Right now, not much. The Aggies have a powerful twosome in leading scorers Josh Carter and Joseph Jones. That’s about it.
What’s not to like: A&M has simply forgotten how to score, dipping as low as 37 points on March 1.
Bracketability: They’re not going far—even a first-round loss is possibile. Look for an upset here if you want to increase your chances of making some money.
VANDERBILT
Record: 26-7 (10-6 SEC)
What’s to like: G/F Shan Foster scores a ton, and A.J. Ogilvy anchors the middle for the Commodores, who played very well in the SEC, including knocking off then-No. 1 Tennessee.
What’s not to like: Vanderbilt limps into the postseason, having lost three of its last five, a span in which the Commodores gave up 80 points a game.
Bracketability: Vanderbilt is a dangerous team, but putting three big wins together in a row right now might be beyond their ability. Vandy goes down on the first weekend.
PURDUE
Record: 24-8 (15-3 Big Ten)
What’s to like: The Boilermakers have returned to winning form, leading the Big Ten in three-point percentage and steals. Robbie Hummel is their best double threat from the inside and out.
What’s not to like: Unlike your daddy’s Boilers, these are not big-bangers and tough rebounders, rely instead on shooting and scoring contributions from at least seven players every game.
Bracketability: Without fantastic performances from all concerned parties, PU won't make it past Saturday.