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5 Things We Learned About the NFL Over the Holidays

It’s been a weird and wild regular season…


Photo: Carlos Gonzalez / Landov | Licensed to Alpha Media Group 2012

1. We Just Watched One of the Greatest Seasons From a Running Back, Ever
Running backs who shred their knees into meat chunks don’t typically challenge the single season rushing record the next year. But Adrian Peterson did just that. Coming just a tantalizing nine yards shy of Eric Dickerson’s 2,105 yard 1984 record, Peterson returned from a catastrophic injury in just eight months and ran rampant like a magical, football-carrying unicorn over a league that’s now known for passing.

2. …And From a Wide Receiver
Just because it’s a bombs-away league doesn’t mean Calvin Johnson’s season is anything to sneeze at. (Why do people “sneeze” at things they don’t care for, anyway? That’s just a very silly thing to do.) Megatron broke or tied three receiving records, the most important being Jerry Rice’s yards in a season. The Lions receiver racked up 1,964 yards and utterly demolished any talk of a “Madden Curse” on his season. Though perhaps the hex was just passed on to the Lions organization in general…

3. Nobody Knows Who Alfred Morris Is
But they should. The other Redskin rookie quietly put together a season that would have wowed the league if Adrian Peterson hadn’t been busy dumping 200 yard loads on opposing defenses every week. Second in rushing, Morris put up over 1,600 yards on the ground and would have been a lock for rookie of the year if his teammate and QB, RGIII, hadn’t had one of the great rookie QB seasons of all time. But there’s no doubt that the pair together brought the ‘Skins back to the playoffs for the first time in seven centuries (or what certainly feels like it).

4. And They Weren’t the Only Rookies to Dominate
Quarterbacks Russell Wilson and Andrew Luck, plus gosh darn kicker Blair Walsh, all had seasons worth remembering. Wilson and Luck will lead their teams to the playoffs while Walsh was 10-10 on 50+ yard field goals, which, according to the former NFL kicker who works as a toilet attendant in our lobby, is very impressive.

5. You Now Know The Chicago Bears’ Wi-Fi Password
And it’s even sadder than you imagined.

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