I Want to Be a Hilton

Reviewed by:
Patrick Richardson

Some people are born with money (Paris), some marry it (Paris' mommy), and some compete for it on television (these Midwesterners). Fourteen hopeful Hiltons are out to prove that they too are undeserving of the public's attention and the spoils of the elite in this new reality game show. MILF Kathy Hilton takes a Trump-esque turn as mentor to a group of plebeians, all of whom are being schooled in proper etiquette and tested at the end of every episode. Those best versed in the ways of Manhattan society move one step closer to the grand prize of $250,000, while those who can't decipher a salad fork from a pitchfork are spit back out into the working class. Apparently, we're to believe there's more to being a Hilton than brash behavior, but the only Hiltonly duty on display here is whoring your good name for bad reality TV. The premise is decidedly worn, and most of the wannabes seem to be prepping for future stints on The Surreal Life. Even Paris and Nicky notice mom's in trouble and take the contestants off her hands to go clubbing in the Hamptons, but even writhing young Hiltons aren't enough to save the show from the sucking.