It's getting warmer outside...awesome. But who needs to play outside when there are so many TV options to choose from these days? There's too much for any one person to completely monitor, but that doesn't mean we're not going to do our best to sift through all the listings and figure out what you should be watching every week...with all the highlights, lowlights and guilty pleasures you can stand. Nice weather be damned.
Monday, April 12th
9:30 p.m. The Big Bang Theory (CBS)
Sheldon's celebrity archnemesis Wil Wheton returns after the two faced off in October's "The Creepy Candy Coating Corollary." Here's hoping their battle of wits escalates into something more epic than another roleplaying game. (The kind with cards and elves, we mean.) Meanwhile, Penny and Leonard get in a major fight about something or other. If they break up, nerds of the world must unite and force producers to correct this mistake...
Also on Monday
10:00 p.m. Southern Fried Sting (truTV)
From the network that brings us "actuality" television, Sting stars a former lawman who now works as a kind of private detective (sans Magnum mustache), tracking nogoodniks down and turning them over to whoever hired him (or just the cops). It all sounds very "not quite legal." The half-hour series kicks off on Monday with back-to-back episodes...which means back-to-back perps getting tackled and/or tased.
Tuesday, April 13th
9:00 p.m. Lost (ABC)
Honestly, Lost has been the sixth entry that doesn't quite make the cut in this column every week since it's returned to the airwaves. Like everyone else, we're not really sure what the deal with those weird flashsideways things are, but after the last episode, we've got plenty of theories. (If you've never seen the show...sorry. The space allotted does not permit an explanation.) This week's ep focuses on everyone's favorite well-fed Lostie, Hurley. Hopefully we'll get some more crucial, "What's really going on?" info as the series hurdles towards its finale.
Wednesday, April 14th
9:00 p.m. MythBusters (Discovery)
Apparently there's a myth about beer bottles: hitting someone in the head with an empty one does more damage than hitting someone in the head with a full one. We're guessing this myth started when one drunk guy wanted to crack the skull of another drunk guy without wasting a full brewski. Check out this week's MythBusters to see if the tall tale's confirmed or busted. (And please, guys, don't go wasting the expensive stuff.)
Saturday, April 17th
9:00 p.m. Doctor Who (BBC America)
Alright, alright, we know that Doctor Who's not everyone's cup of Earl Grey, but this might be a good jumping-on point for new viewers as the latest series premieres in the States. While the words "wonderfully goofy British sci-fi classic" will have many non-geeks running for the hills, don't tighten those laces just yet — have you seen Karen Gillian, who plays the good doctor's companion, Amy Pond? We'd like to hear more about her bedside manner...
Wednesday, April 14th
11:30 p.m. The Tonight Show With Jay Leno (NBC)
Plugging The Tonight Show hurts our Conan-loving souls, but this episode can't be ignored. Sit through Jay's tedious monologue and comedic bits (that your grandma would love if she were still awake) for the chance to see Tracy Morgan on live television. The man exemplifies the term "loose cannon" and will do almost anything for a laugh on live TV. Also on deck: Ever-mustached country singer Alan Jackson. We have no idea what he and Morgan could possibly discuss backstage, but we hope the cameras find their way behind the curtain...
Wednesday, April 14th
11:00, 11:30 p.m. Three Sheets (Travel Channel)
The station to seek out to when you want to pretend it's not the dead of winter or raining cats and dogs, the Travel Channel now offers an in-depth look at getting drunk in other places and countries. There will be two half-hour episodes on Wednesday, the first featuring the alcoholic beverages of Hawaii (aloha-colic?) and the second moves to Tuscany, profiling boozes like coconut porter and Chianti. We'll take a drink of PBR every time an alcoholic beverage is mentioned! Or shown on screen. We just want to drink.