The Taste premieres tonight on ABC. You can think of it as the food version of American Idol. Four panelists sit at a neon-lit table and take one blind bite of competitors' dishes. The show's only appetizing quality? Anthony Bourdain. So how does The Taste match up against the recently retired Anthony Bourdain: No Reservations? We measured them up in five very well thought-out and vital television categories.
Photo by CRAIG SJODIN/ ABC
What else is television for?
No Reservations had an episode on a Brazilian beach (with some Brazilian beauties) and a few cameos from Bourdain's cute wife. The Taste has Nigella Lawson, who looks pretty smokin' at 53. Winner: The Taste.
We need a few four-letter words to spice things up.
Since it's ABC, we can bet there won't be a lot of cursing and sexual references. No Reservations was chock full of both. Winner: No Reservations.
What's it all about?
In No Reservations, we got to watch badass Bourdain eat weird shit around the world. In The Taste, we watch the same badass become the next Simon Cowell. Winner: No Reservations.
Everyone knows a good show is founded on booze.
There's a lot of it on No Reservations. We're willing to bet there's not much of that on The Taste. Winner: No Reservations.
We need some cutthroat action.
There wasn't really any on No Reservations; just one silvery-haired brute having a good time. The Taste is all about competitive cooking. The Winner: The Taste.
So there you have it. The Taste probably won't be that great, but then again, we haven't seen it yet. At least we still have Anthony Bourdain: The Layover.