This Porn Star Found a Very Special Way to Honor Our Veterans

She’s thanking them for their service with more service.

When it comes to our national holiday for honoring America’s veterans, it’s important to sit down, give thanks, and take stock of what’s really important in life: blowjobs. Lots of them. For free.

Which is why this story from Broadly is enough to bring a tear to any red-blooded American’s patriotic eye. Meet Jenny Jizz, a 47-year-old porn star just starting out in the industry with a penchant for the jobs we call blow. And today, on Veteran’s Day, she’ll be making an appearance at Florida’s Sausage Castle. Never heard of it? Consider it an over-the-top, sex-crazed boning factory where the party literally never ends. Helmed by Mike Busey, purveyor of all things eccentrically erotic, the Sausage Castle will be throwing a bash for vets today, and Ms. Jizz will be a guest of honor.

Broadly reports that she will offer up blowjobs for anyone who shows up, provided they are not too hairy or smell bad. See guys? Grooming matters. On top of that, she went on record saying, “I think it’ll give [the veterans] stress relief and a new sex drive.” 

Jenny Jizz, we salute you and your blowjobs. May you be free of lockjaw and cotton mouth as you show your thanks for our troops today. God bless America.

Photos by Daniel Bendjy / Getty Images