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John Cusack Discusses Death

Icon-since-the-’80s John Cusack stars as Edgar Allan Poe in the dark and creepy The Raven. What better time to discuss death?

What lady did you want to sleep with?
One with a face made before I was born: Ann-Margret or Rita Hayworth.

 

What’s the craziest thing you’ve done during your lifetime?
Got in the ring with a few fighters I shouldn’t have. Lucky enough to still have my brain functioning.
 

Who is not invited to your funeral?
Blowhards, cowards, crooks, and c*nts.
 

Deathbed confession: You’ve been in more than 50 movies. Which would you like to boot off your résumé?
I wouldn’t be thinking about movies on my death bed…and certainly not the bad ones.
 

Edgar Allan Poe was a master of horror. What’s the creepiest way you could die?
Buried alive in his honor.
 

What would you ask Poe if you met him in the afterlife?
Feeling better?
 

Which of your fellow Brat Packers would you most want to hang with in the afterlife?
Which of the entertainment writers who worked on Teen Beat would you like to die with? What kind of batshit-crazy question is that?
 

Which would you least want to be with?
Which Brat Pack member? Are you fucking serious, you fiend?
 

You’re a big supporter of Chicago. What’s one thing you’re going to miss most about it when you’re gone?
Wrigley Field.


Are you going to heaven or hell?
Yes. Since hell is a state of spirit, you can only grasp it by imagining it, so I’ve been there. Heaven would be a charming place where the right song is always on, the lights are always pleasing to the eye, and it never closes.
 

Who on Earth did you want to punch?
Any cowards who retreat into the bosom of cruelty from a position of authority.


If you return as an animal, would you  pick a raven?
A dolphin would be great. Certainly not an ominous bird of yore.
 

What does it say on your tombstone?
Res ipsa loquitur: “The thing speaks for itself.”