There will be blood. Of course there will… it’s Halloween, silly.
Designed to look like an overturned bucket of blood, the Liquid Lamp is just the thing to keep your boss from sticking his head into your office. $253, gnr8.biz
You’re So Vein
Legend has it that Hungarian “Blood Countess” Elizabeth Bathory murdered 650 virgins so she could bathe in their blood. Seems like a terrible waste of virgins when she could have gotten the same effect with Spinning Hat’s Blood Bath Shower Gel. Also great for re-creating the shower scene from Carrie with your girlfriend. $7, amazon.com
Cue the Screechy Music
Your bathroom will look like Norman Bates just stepped out when you decorate it with the Blood Bath Shower Curtain. “Mother! Oh, God, mother! Blood! Blood!” $18, amazon.com
Eat Your Heart Out
Last summer a 21-year-old college student killed his roommate and ate his heart. That’s rude and unappetizing. We prefer to satisfy those Dahmeresque cravings with the Gelatin Heart Mold. It makes a tasty dessert, without all the, you know, mess. $6, amazon.com
You Can’t Beat This
Don’t wear your heart on your sleeve—keep it on your desk, where it can be put to good use holding your pencils. If you’re feeling romantic, the soft plastic Anatomical Heart Pencil Holder can double as a vase. $20, neatoshop.com
Check out Maxim's Sexy and Scary Halloween Guide.