These actual unstoppable police officers aren’t part machine, but they are incredibly awesome at taking a beating and coming back blasting.
Photos Courtesy of Columbia Pictures
Lieutenant Brian Murphy (Murphy!) was the heroic officer who first responded to a shooting in a Sikh temple in Wisconsin in August 2012. He was shot nine times and not only survived, but insisted that paramedics tend to the wounded civilians first. We’re just assuming that some of those bullets bounced right off his enormous balls.
Right after his partner was shot and killed in September of 1988, Officer Gregory Jaglowski found himself with rounds in both his legs courtesy of a mad man who wanted to “kill everyone I see.” The Chicago officer managed to radio for help, then returned to the public school where the psychopath had already killed three others, and engaged in another gun battle…where he was wounded again. Thankfully, the bullet he fired into the psycho’s chest did a lot more than injure him.
After detaining a young shoplifter in March of 2003, Sergeant Marcus Young was accosted by the suspect's boyfriend. Young was shot multiple times (once in the face!) and stabbed with a hunting knife. His attacker, leaving him for dead, ran to Young’s police vehicle and jumped in the front seat. His right side paralyzed, Young cried out to the young trainee he had with him. In a feat that would cause RoboCop himself to instigate an approving high-five, Young commanded the trainee to draw Young’s gun for him and place it in his left hand, at which point the sergeant managed to take aim and finally kill the crazed attacker.
Deputy Jennifer Fulford-Salvano
After three years at a first job, most people are just settling in; you’ve learned everybody’s name, maybe you buy Girl Scout cookies from a couple workers. You probably don’t expect to get shot 10 times. Or manage to land two perfect headshots on the drug dealers who lit you up, with your non-dominant hand, like Deputy Jennifer Fulford-Salvano did back in May 2004. Astonishingly, she was back at work less than three months later, having first married her firefighter fiancé, presumably out of a desire to produce the toughest kids the world will ever see.
After responding to a home invasion call in March 2010, plucky K9 officer Bandit was shot in the neck, but he still managed to block the suspect’s escape path long enough for other responding officers to take him out. OK, Bandit probably didn’t respond on the radio himself. Because he’s a dog.
Chaudhry Aslam Khan
An honorable mention on our list of notable survivors, Pakistan’s toughest cop, Chaudhry Aslam Khan, survived 10 assassination attempts. Bombs, IEDs, regular old guns…the man was practically invincible. We say “practically” because, tragically, the Taliban assassins succeeded on their eleventh attempt just last month.
After getting shot in the chest back in October 2012, NYPD officer Ivan Marcano thought it would be a good idea to drive to the hospital. But, as you do when you come across the guys who shot you after they’ve wrecked their getaway car, Marcano left his vehicle, held one hand over the bullet wound in his chest and shot one of the perps in the head. Oh, then he chased one other suspect on foot for a little while, just because.
If you were hit head-on by a car, it’s likely that your first, second, and third reaction would be to cry. Or just, you know, die. Not so for Officer Kevin Howland: The California cop, after being struck and rolled onto the roof of a fleeing armed robber’s car in May 2006, pulled his gun and put eight shots through the windshield and into the driver. Think about that next time you moan about getting splashed by a passing bicycle.
Seriously, how many people can get shot in the face, and then continue to do their job? Texas Officer Ann Carrizales managed to eat a bullet to the cheek after a routine traffic stop turned violent in October last year. When the perp sped off, rather than curling up in a fetal ball, as any normal person would do, the former U.S. Marine gave chase in her vehicle, pursuing her assailant for 20 miles and ensuring his arrest.
Apparently there’s a “TOP COP” award. What does it take to win one? Shockingly, the answer is not 12 box tops from Cap'n Crunch. No, you’ve just got to rescue six bound-and-gagged kids, then get tossed through a plate glass window while fighting two kidnappers hand-to-hand, like Chicago police sergeant Don Jerome did in November 2011. We’re pretty sure that qualifies for RoboCop's “Protect the innocent” directive.